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Because Of You

i do not remember the shift     
it must have happened slowly
spreading like a deadly disease

in the beginning it was heaven
he put me high on his throne
and treated me like a queen

he was a lost soul like me
an artist, a poet, a wanderer
a connection beyond compare

till the shock: it was just sex

(which i still don’t believe)

slowly my brain got washed
believing the fables i was fed
ambivalent feelings imprinted

you give your life a 7 out of 10
don’t you see it’s just worth a 3

my strength crushed and deleted
my selfesteem killed and defeated
degraded humiliated manipulated

i gave you the benefit of the doubt
when will i see you again?  i miss you
you forget a lot, do you have dementia
sorry sweety, will you forgive me please
have you been tested for schizophrenia
you are my fairy, you are mine forever

forever his harsh words will linger
Text: i will be in Spain for 2 weeks

i still remember the weeks i waited
the exact date that he came back
the silence that lasted for days


broken by a ruthless text

____________________?

a heart that stops
a body that crashes

the questions remain:
am i nothing but a joke
am i really that worthless
was i just an object to use

i still feel as if i never existed

[controlled] - [altered] - [deleted]
Written by Duende
Published | Edited 8th Mar 2025
Author's Note
The G - You Learn About It.

https://youtu.be/aGZQsD1KOEw
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