The trigger was just waiting...

I can’t help but feel the pain,
Losing you came at a cost,
Trying to put myself back together,
A game I’ve nearly lost.

Thinking about you today,
Brought it all back,
Endless depression,
Someone end this attack.

Lonely, almost alone
But this is what I want,
I can’t let you see,
What I’ve now become.

Deprived of love,
Nowhere to turn,
I chased everyone away,
When I lost you.

I can’t face the truth,
Living in the past,
Is my lifeline,
For now atleast.

My heart still beats,
Although shallow,
And without desire
Now it can’t have you.

Tasting the steel,
But without courage,
Eternal sleep craved,
But not yet reality.

I left you a message,
You are now free,
I’ve let go of you,
By letting go of me.

You won’t hear me,
I will not haunt you,
You didn’t want me,
And I couldn’t face it.

The idea of being alone atlast,
Memories of you erased,
As I ponder the idea,
Of an after life.

My past a distant memory,
For I’ve bitten the bullet,
The trigger was just waiting,
For me to pull it….