The last lost forgotten poem to you...

I never thought it would be this hard
No one knows how it feels
They tell me I'll get over you
But I won't
The last words you said to me was
Go and make a success of your life
I love you
It wasn't that bad at first
Because there were people around me
I told them what happened
All they could say was I'm sorry
But I'm the one who should be sorry
The one who should apologize
For not being there the last moments
Now I'm without you
You died having my heart in your
I'll never love anyone this much
As I have always loved you
When we talked about our problems
You seemed to always cheer me up
You would sometimes just listen
Without giving any advice
But that was the best advice
Anyone has ever given me
You taught me a lot about life
Like to never give up
It doesn't help to build a bridge
Because you will never get over it
Yes you did hurt me a few times
Yes I hurt you a few times
We both broke some promises
But because love held us together
We learned to trust each other again
We always made jokes about the future
Talked about the past
And lived in the presence
Sometimes I wish that
I could have gone with you
But you told me to
Make a success out of my life
So I will
In the daylight
I do miss you a lot
But I don't show my pain
There are too many people around me
And in night time
When I lay in my bed
Thinking back on good times
I start to cry
Not because I miss you
But because you aren't there anymore
When I get cold
You said you'll come and hold me
When I'm scared
You told me that everything will be OK
All those poems we wrote
I will always keep them
Maybe its not on a piece of paper
But it will forever stay in my heart
Of there's one thing
I still want you to know is
I will love you until the day I die
And then I will still love you
It hurts me to talk about you
I wish I could thank you
For all the pain you had given me
Because without those pain
I would never durvive life
And every single day in my life passes
And I wonder
Do you watch me from above
I wish there was a way
I could give you this poem
Every night when I go to sleep
I have a teddy bear under my arm
The one you gave me
But for now I have to go
See you one day Jaen...