The Feeling

The struggle, the pain. The gilt, the feeling. Seeing the scars, feeling the blood run down my skin. Something inside of me, tells me just do it and everything will be okay. There's this silent scream the floods inside of me. Just wanting to be set free. The pain that's from the past, takes a ahold of me. I want to move forward and be the best part of me... But, I miss the feeling, the feeling of cutting, burning, choking, and almost dying... The marks on me, help me see and make me believe that I'm not hurting me... Im helping me through all the tragedy. No one understands the feelings that I have inside of me. This is something I need to do. So stop judging me. 💔 just makes me believe, I'm not worth anything. The feeling of cutting sends all the stress away from me. The feeling of burning helps me know that this is the present and everything that has happen to me that's all laid behind me... The feeling of me choking, feeling of almost dying has me feel... Finally, all the pain that I shoved down and pushed away for so long will finally stop being apart of me.. So maybe. One day. I'll be able to keep my promise, so you won't have to worry about me.... Because, that day I'll be sitting right beside God (Our Father) and he'll take care of me.