Dull blades hurt the best

I'm so sick of this tombstone
I'm so sick of travelling back to hell
But it helps in itself to relieve all of my tension
because when a blade is a blade
I don't care if it's dull
because when I hate myself
my emotions are null
So I force it out of my system
let it leak out of my brain stem
because without this creative juice
I go back to the pain
that I hold over myself
but that's when I realize it all was in vain
because when a blade is a blade
I don't care if it's dull
because when I hate myself
my emotions are null
So I gave an eye to return
To keep my mental state from causing concern
and even if it is second best
because even if,
this blade is a blade
I can at least keep my emotions far from null