a realization of events

Heart pounding way too fast, how long is this panic going to last? Your words echo in my head, making me wish I was dead.  
 
I can't do this, not again. Why do I have to suffer for your sin?! I won't do this anymore! I'm going to even the fucking score!  
 
Pop these pills and off myself, no one longer cares about my mental health. Thinking it will bring peace I drift off to sleep , only to awaken with a pain somewhere deep.
 
A new type of panic begins to rise, I now regret attempting this demise. What did I do?! What DO I do?!
 
Nervously I wake my mother, for there is no other. Quietly she gets up and drives me to the hospital, I know she is going to help me with this obstacle.
 
So many questions flying at me, my mind answers methodically. No more panic, no emotion at all. Just a mental block, you might say a wall.  
 
Days spent drifting between awake and asleep. Not a thought dares to creep. Finally I realize where I am. The place for crazies, kinda like in Batman.  
 
Days spent jumping through hoops, even being asked about my poops. Counting down to my release, hoping I will find some peace.  
 
The others here, make me wish I had a beer. I feel perfectly sane compared to them, makes me say "I certainly won't do this again!"  
 
Finally they say I'm going to be free! My home, I can't wait to see! Have my bed, my food, my cat. My home is where it's at!  
 
The day goes agonizingly slow, waiting for my mom to finally show. One more horrible dinner later, I'm with mom and her foot on the accelerator!