deepundergroundpoetry.com
Fake Smile
I plaster, a fake smile
Day by day
I would like to brake down
Where can I get strength, to get back up
I carry all hate and Gilt, on my shoulders
I see myself
As a dying Child
I walk around, with a disgusting smile
Thinking my life is all right
It's killing me, day by day
I walked away from the light, long time ago
I'm disturbed Child
This fake smile!, lets me pass by people who don't understand
It's not like, I will see your face again
You will see me, As the child with split heart
You start to see, the child's life, beginning to slip away
I close my eyes, and start to pray, that my problems will go away
Hate, Anger, Gilt, is my filter, to walk again
You got to be blind, if you didn't see me dying
I put on a fake smile, when I died !!
Day by day
I would like to brake down
Where can I get strength, to get back up
I carry all hate and Gilt, on my shoulders
I see myself
As a dying Child
I walk around, with a disgusting smile
Thinking my life is all right
It's killing me, day by day
I walked away from the light, long time ago
I'm disturbed Child
This fake smile!, lets me pass by people who don't understand
It's not like, I will see your face again
You will see me, As the child with split heart
You start to see, the child's life, beginning to slip away
I close my eyes, and start to pray, that my problems will go away
Hate, Anger, Gilt, is my filter, to walk again
You got to be blind, if you didn't see me dying
I put on a fake smile, when I died !!
Published 15th Apr 2011
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comments 5
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Anonymous
16th Apr 2011 1:52am
Spelling checking might be necessary, as well as getting rid of some unnecessary punctuation and capitalization.
spell check ex. *break, *guilt
unnecessary punctuation ex. "I plaster a fake smile", "I carry all hate and guilt", "This fake smile lets me pass by.."
unnecessary capitalization ex. "As a dying child", "Hate, anger, guilt is my filter"
I think that, cleaned up, this could be a substantial poem. :]
spell check ex. *break, *guilt
unnecessary punctuation ex. "I plaster a fake smile", "I carry all hate and guilt", "This fake smile lets me pass by.."
unnecessary capitalization ex. "As a dying child", "Hate, anger, guilt is my filter"
I think that, cleaned up, this could be a substantial poem. :]
16th Apr 2011 6:09pm
It doesn't matter what the spelling is as long you get the message, for your imformation
23rd Apr 2011 4:05pm
man that i power full and how cares about spelling as long as you get something off you chest and if no one respect that thin they shouldn't read your poetry
23rd Apr 2011 4:31pm
do you read many published poems with typos? you don't. If you are making a sincere message which you are, it is lost on the reader. Unbreakable's comment doesn't technically make sense. All you have to do is run the poem through word. Google 'basic' grammar.' Despite the rebellious nature ofthe young poet it is important that work is presented properly.
25th Apr 2011 2:01am
it doesn't matter if it's not spelled right, as Long as you get the message!! go read the poem i called fuck OFF!!! get it through your head or what's left of it!
