depressed again

Its hard to be so strong
when they talk about addicts
Doesn't she realize drugs aren't
the only thing you can be addicted to..
My depression consumes me once again.
God I wish I felt like I had a friend.
I wish I had a  razorblade.
I wish I could do it again..
My heart beats fast and my skin crawls
to be ripped apart once more,
I crave that pain
Temporary release
Feeling alone..
I am falling to my knees.
I am ready to give up now...
But no one seems to see.
The sines are all there..
but it doesn't matter now.