i just don't understand

I just don’t understand
She tells me she’ll stop
She promises that it was the last time
But every time she says it
About a week later
She comes to me crying,
Blood stains on her long sleeve shirt
I’m sure she does it for attention
But I’m the only one that knows
What does she want from me?
Do I ignore her
So she doesn’t get what she wants
So she sees that it isn’t working
Or do I try to help her?
I’ve decided to help her through this
I don’t want her to hurt herself anymore
I just want her to be happy

She texted me one day
Said that she tried to kill herself
She told me that she has tried before
What do I do?
What do I say?
I told her that I wanted to talk to her in person about this
After I said “goodnight”
And told her that everything was going to be all right
I cried myself to sleep
We never did talk about it
Neither of us wanted to taint the time we had together

One night when we went to watch a movie
And got coffee after
I told her I would be away for a month
To visit family in Italy
She was sad but she smiled at me
And gave me a kiss goodbye
I contacted her and told her I loved her
As much as I could
Then one day I woke up to “I think we should break up…”
In my mind I was screaming
Breaking my computer was in half
Punching holes in the wall
But I couldn’t move
Tears streamed down my face
Like the blood down her arms
She told me its because she wanted time to herself
To deal with her suicidal thoughts
That’s not something you deal with on your own
And I said that
I knew that that was a bullshit excuse
Then she told me it was because of school
And I knew that was phony too
She kept up making up excuses
Until I said stop
I wanted to know why but this was too much to handle
I ran to the shower and stayed there
Crying
Until my uncle came to check on me
I told him I was just fine

The next two weeks
Were the worst of my life
My one and only
Had ruined my trip
She destroyed every sense
In my body
All I wanted
Was for her to be safe
All I wanted was for her
Not to want to kill herself
And after all that
She made me want to kill myself