deepundergroundpoetry.com
Junkie
Run
As fast as I can.
You can catch me I'm a junkie, man.
A pill here
A snort there
A sip here
A hit there.
There I go again
Running
Running away
From everything and everyone good for me.
So I run
Run as fast as I can.
Even My brain can't catch me I'm a junkie, man.
As fast as I can.
You can catch me I'm a junkie, man.
A pill here
A snort there
A sip here
A hit there.
There I go again
Running
Running away
From everything and everyone good for me.
So I run
Run as fast as I can.
Even My brain can't catch me I'm a junkie, man.
Published 15th Mar 2011
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likes 5
reading list entries 0
comments 6
reads 1165
Commenting Preference:
The author encourages honest critique.
16th Mar 2011 8:51pm
the play on the whole "gingerbread man" tag line is really effective, i like it.
16th Mar 2011 11:18pm
I like the parallel of the Gingerbread Man rhyme, and I like that you used your punctuation and line breaks effectively here (which I think I remember commenting about in some of your previous work). The one bit of advice I might add would be to try adding more descriptive words, adjectives and stuff, to build the mood around your ideas. It's the poetic equivalent of decorating a house... You can build your house (the ideas in your poem) as strong as you want, but unless you paint the walls and hang decorations, you won't want to live there! Overall though, this is a pretty good piece.
18th Mar 2011 1:33am
24th Apr 2011 5:56am
I love this! The detail is so simple, yet still very descriptive..thats so hard to do!
25th Apr 2011 2:16am
26th Nov 2012 11:18pm
short and sweet and to the point. not much more explanation need. Nice rhythm.
