A Day for Family

Family is coming today
I better turn that frown upside down
wish my stomach wasn't so damn queezy
I just can't settle down.

I'll do my little girls hair
put her in a pretty dress
pull my hair back in a ponytail
and forget about all the rest.

I'm not in the mood to deal with any one
I wish everyone understood why.
But I can't tell, they'll send me away
so instead I'll sit here and cry.

I'm sweating like you wouldn't believe
my hands so horribly clammy
but goose bumps on my arms almost hurt
how long do I hide this from my family?

I need a change in my life
but I don't see that coming my way....
I'm not ready to stop, but God, I am
today is only my second day.

Tomorrow will be the true test
one I'm sure that I won't succeed
I'll walk out that door after I drop her at school
and go get what I need.

But today I'll deal with the family
look around the table, watch everyone smile
when deep in me they don't see what's going on
I'll put on a fake attitude, like it's never gone outta style.