Thoughts19

5:32 am
Can't sleep
Why the fuck can't I sleep?
Two nights of this shit
No racing thoughts
Just
Restlessness

I read through some text messages from when I was up in Indy
From while I was high
I want to smoke again
Although, lately I've felt kind of high
Between the withdrawal from my antidepressants and the lack of sleep
I spent a few days in a state of euphoria
Spaced out
Slap happy
Goofy

5:38 am

I have the fan in my room on
I always have it on when I sleep
It serves a duel purpose
One, to keep me cool
And two, as a sound machine of sorts

The other night I sat in my music room
The black lights kissed the whites of my eyes
They reminded me of being in Zach's basement
Of my month in Indy
They brought back foggy memories of beautiful moments
Shared with friends
Laughing
Watching shitty movies
Watching good movies
Watching Eddie Izzard
Just being alive and together

5:45 am
I'm tired, boss. Dog tired.