Submissions by toniscales (Lost Girl)
POEMS AND SHORT STORIES
Poet Introduction
I am very critical of my own work but I tend to love intensely, and writing is an emotional release and catharsis I can't seem to resist.
DARK POEM
Published
25th Apr 2024 2:27am
25th Apr 2024 2:27am
trailer song
I lie on my back, gaze up at the ceiling. At stars. Black water spots. There are ghosts in the carpets, thick with blood and dog piss. Mother collects our hearts in empty shampoo bottles. They line the walls of the bathroom like canopic jars. The air conditioner leaks dark water. Everything floats eventually. Boxes of dryer sheets, the pink silk nightie the rats ate through, fevered and hungry. My wants, all tattered lace bearing teeth marks, fevered and hungry.
*
All day, this pale light, flickering. The pain is not only centered in our brains, our hearts. It snakes...
*
All day, this pale light, flickering. The pain is not only centered in our brains, our hearts. It snakes...
#dark
#death
#gothic
173 reads
7 Comments
FICTIONAL PROSE
Published
18th Apr 2024 6:26pm
18th Apr 2024 6:26pm
The Hospital
#dirty
#erotic
#orgasm #sex
#orgasm #sex
215 reads
17 Comments
NON-FICTION PROSE
Published
17th Apr 2024 3:06am
17th Apr 2024 3:06am
April 16, 2024
Attempting to journal again for the first time in so very many years…
It just all starts to crumble when my daughter’s fiance comes home from work in the afternoons. They will go into their bedroom to be alone together for the rest of the night, which is clearly understandable and something I want to be able to give them without annoyance or interruption or being a burden…
But then, I am alone.
I have my interests to keep me busy… But I am mentally ill, and when left alone, my thoughts can travel to dark places.
I am 50 now. Still struggling with...
It just all starts to crumble when my daughter’s fiance comes home from work in the afternoons. They will go into their bedroom to be alone together for the rest of the night, which is clearly understandable and something I want to be able to give them without annoyance or interruption or being a burden…
But then, I am alone.
I have my interests to keep me busy… But I am mentally ill, and when left alone, my thoughts can travel to dark places.
I am 50 now. Still struggling with...
#SelfReflection
#nonfiction
165 reads
6 Comments
NON-FICTION PROSE
Published
23rd Mar 2024 1:55pm
23rd Mar 2024 1:55pm
Society of the Snow Tribute
(May contain possible film spoilers. Please forgive me for this.)
Tonight I watched Society of the Snow on Netflix with my daughter.
I'm still reeling from it. I've never wept so much after watching a film. The tears poured out of me and did not seem to cease.
It's important that I try to say what I'm about to say. At least for myself alone. Even my daughter encouraged me to write this, to try to express the deep sense of grief I feel.
I can't stop thinking about this film. I keep seeing its harrowing, indelible images in my mind.
I...
Tonight I watched Society of the Snow on Netflix with my daughter.
I'm still reeling from it. I've never wept so much after watching a film. The tears poured out of me and did not seem to cease.
It's important that I try to say what I'm about to say. At least for myself alone. Even my daughter encouraged me to write this, to try to express the deep sense of grief I feel.
I can't stop thinking about this film. I keep seeing its harrowing, indelible images in my mind.
I...
#admiration
180 reads
2 Comments
LOVE POEM
Published
23rd Mar 2024 12:37pm
23rd Mar 2024 12:37pm
The Search
(for Henry Cavill)
My love.
Why did you leave me here alone?
I do not know how many years ago
we were together.
I do know I once shared your bed.
You wrapped me safely
in your strong arms
and protected me against a world
congested by cold hearts
and even colder intentions.
For centuries,
I searched for you.
But you left me
with this gut-wrenching emptiness
like a hunger never to be sated
by any food.
I scanned the faces of men
for your...
My love.
Why did you leave me here alone?
I do not know how many years ago
we were together.
I do know I once shared your bed.
You wrapped me safely
in your strong arms
and protected me against a world
congested by cold hearts
and even colder intentions.
For centuries,
I searched for you.
But you left me
with this gut-wrenching emptiness
like a hunger never to be sated
by any food.
I scanned the faces of men
for your...
#love
#loneliness
214 reads
5 Comments
SELF POEM
Published
14th Mar 2024 9:26am
14th Mar 2024 9:26am
Subtle Thoughts of Autumn
The rain falls all around me.
Its gentle, soothing music like golden chimes.
There are colors in the wind.
Reds and blues, the slight breath
of leaves in autumn.
Like fingers lightly slipping down my spine.
I am deeply hurting.
A soft infatuation.
It stings to think of him.
I gently glide my fingers through my hair,
its sweet perfume of roses and snow
rushing to greet me.
I dream of falling snowflakes,
feel deep inside me the heartbeat throb
of sadness. I turn to leave,
and instead of saying goodbye, ...
Its gentle, soothing music like golden chimes.
There are colors in the wind.
Reds and blues, the slight breath
of leaves in autumn.
Like fingers lightly slipping down my spine.
I am deeply hurting.
A soft infatuation.
It stings to think of him.
I gently glide my fingers through my hair,
its sweet perfume of roses and snow
rushing to greet me.
I dream of falling snowflakes,
feel deep inside me the heartbeat throb
of sadness. I turn to leave,
and instead of saying goodbye, ...
#love
#depression
193 reads
3 Comments
FICTIONAL PROSE
Published
19th Feb 2024 11:04pm
19th Feb 2024 11:04pm
In Your Bed
I wanted to share one more link. Thanks so much.
https://www.wattpad.com/story/363346024?utm_source=android&utm_medium=com.atomczak.notepat&utm_content=story_info&wp_page=story_details_button&wp_uname=toniscales2
https://www.wattpad.com/story/363346024?utm_source=android&utm_medium=com.atomczak.notepat&utm_content=story_info&wp_page=story_details_button&wp_uname=toniscales2
#romantic
283 reads
0 Comments
FICTIONAL PROSE
Published
19th Feb 2024 10:17pm
19th Feb 2024 10:17pm
More Human Than Human
Hi. I hope everyone is doing great. I wanted to share one of my books on Wattpad. 🙂
https://www.wattpad.com/story/362166196?utm_source=android&utm_medium=com.atomczak.notepat&utm_content=story_info&wp_page=story_details_button&wp_uname=toniscales2
https://www.wattpad.com/story/362166196?utm_source=android&utm_medium=com.atomczak.notepat&utm_content=story_info&wp_page=story_details_button&wp_uname=toniscales2
#erotic
#FallingInLove
291 reads
1 Comment
LOVE POEM
Published
17th Feb 2024 1:33am
17th Feb 2024 1:33am
For Chester
All I know is that I seem to love you.
I watch you on the TV screen,
See your beautiful face and something
Pulls in my gut, some horrible warmth
And tenderness. You make me ache
Inside. I want to be your mother,
I want to be there when you perhaps
Felt like the way I seem to feel
Every minute of every day, and you let
A rope encircle your neck.
Your voice tears its way through my
Soul. I wish you could have stepped
Into my arms. I would have held and
Kissed you softly. But you are gone.
I'm alone without you.
I love...
I watch you on the TV screen,
See your beautiful face and something
Pulls in my gut, some horrible warmth
And tenderness. You make me ache
Inside. I want to be your mother,
I want to be there when you perhaps
Felt like the way I seem to feel
Every minute of every day, and you let
A rope encircle your neck.
Your voice tears its way through my
Soul. I wish you could have stepped
Into my arms. I would have held and
Kissed you softly. But you are gone.
I'm alone without you.
I love...
#love
#hurt
220 reads
9 Comments
SELF POEM
Published
16th Sep 2023 10:21am
16th Sep 2023 10:21am
On Chopin's Posthumous Nocturne in c sharp minor
I was 20 and in love with the boy
who looked like Edward Scissorhands.
At goth clubs and raves we danced
like possessed banshees,
all black veils and fishnet
and smudged eyeliner.
While lost girls were getting high on Ecstasy
in the bathroom and Lords of Acid
dripped from the speakers
my mind flew to my piano lessons.
It was an honor to play
the Fantasie Impromptu,
my Polish teacher with her diminutive hands
instructing me to curl and lift
my fingers precisely
and how I cried in silence at my...
who looked like Edward Scissorhands.
At goth clubs and raves we danced
like possessed banshees,
all black veils and fishnet
and smudged eyeliner.
While lost girls were getting high on Ecstasy
in the bathroom and Lords of Acid
dripped from the speakers
my mind flew to my piano lessons.
It was an honor to play
the Fantasie Impromptu,
my Polish teacher with her diminutive hands
instructing me to curl and lift
my fingers precisely
and how I cried in silence at my...
#love
#depression
#gothic
286 reads
3 Comments
SELF POEM
Published
10th Aug 2023 9:01pm
10th Aug 2023 9:01pm
Portrait of a Suicide
after reading Sally Wen Mao
Maybe it’s because
it's simply too hot now,
the way my hair sticks to my face
in lumpy clumps of grief.
Words and motivation
die upon my lips.
Even my body won't move.
I am filled with secrets
as heavy as sadness.
Every window frames
a haunting regret
and my breath fogs the glass
with ache.
I stare out at fields of memory
as sharp as razors.
Lost kisses plague my thoughts.
I am alone, yet never alone.
Even the flowers droop and wilt ...
Maybe it’s because
it's simply too hot now,
the way my hair sticks to my face
in lumpy clumps of grief.
Words and motivation
die upon my lips.
Even my body won't move.
I am filled with secrets
as heavy as sadness.
Every window frames
a haunting regret
and my breath fogs the glass
with ache.
I stare out at fields of memory
as sharp as razors.
Lost kisses plague my thoughts.
I am alone, yet never alone.
Even the flowers droop and wilt ...
#depression
#grief
248 reads
2 Comments
DARK POEM
Published
31st May 2023 5:11pm
31st May 2023 5:11pm
a haunting
We feed the ghosts with fettuccine and fire extinguishers. Watch as they bend backwards and crawl towards us. Through musty windows the light fails. We set fires to the etiquette books. Don’t brush our teeth for days, the scent of us feral and dreamlike. All night the dresses burn. Mother’s face haloed as she reaches to turn out the lamp. Always this terrible wanting, a woman’s shadow draped across the chair. A thin veil of dust covering everything they tried to make beautiful. We create tents out of sticks and sheets, shine our flashlights through the thick curtain of dark. At midnight, the...
#dark
#gothic
395 reads
5 Comments
DU Poetry : Submissions by toniscales (Lost Girl)
