Another Lesson Learned

Letting down my walls  
Felt like freedom  
 
I allowed love  
To hit me  
Like a ton of bricks  
 
I fell fast and hard  
 
My happiness  
Haphazardly bursting  
At the seams  
 
Every day  
A new beginning  
A breath of fresh air  
 
A chance  
To experience  
The joy I never knew  
 
You were  
The first person  
I let in  
 
I over shared everything  
 
I couldn’t keep  
Myself in check  
 
I didn’t require  
Reciprocation  
 
I did however  
Expect understanding  
 
It was foolish  
And  
My fatal flaw  
 
What I thought  
Was freedom  
Was just a facade  
 
A temporary distraction  
That allowed you  
To misinterpret  
 
It’s not your fault  
 
Since you  
I’ve learned  
Expecting understanding  
Keeps me locked  
In a cage  
 
True freedom  
Is not having  
To prove myself  
 
I’m back to being a fortress  
 
I’ll take that any day  
Over a cage  
 
I won’t  
Make the same  
Mistake again  
Trust me  
 
I’m not for everyone  
Maybe  
Not anyone  
 
Besides  
Who needs  
Love anyway?  
 
I’ve never been good at it  
 
I’d rather take  
My chances  
At Russian Roulette  
 
The odds of survival  
Are much better