Self Poems Seeking Honest Critique
POEMS AND SHORT STORIES
Personal poetry about the way you feel about yourself
Honest critique has been requested for these poems. Want to learn the art of critique? Join our Honestly Crafted Critique group.
Significant
It is not what I have been through
That holds me down
It is what I have done
In reaction to it
And the shame
Of my decisions have kept me
Removed
Rather than actively trying
To correct
I thought if I hid from society
I was doing everyone a favor
Banishing myself because
I didn’t believe I deserved to
Take up space
Minimizing not only my consumption
But also my weight
Keeping small
Enough
To not
Be
Seen
...
That holds me down
It is what I have done
In reaction to it
And the shame
Of my decisions have kept me
Removed
Rather than actively trying
To correct
I thought if I hid from society
I was doing everyone a favor
Banishing myself because
I didn’t believe I deserved to
Take up space
Minimizing not only my consumption
But also my weight
Keeping small
Enough
To not
Be
Seen
...
#NaPoWriMo2024
36 reads
6 Comments
Glad
And if that day done came my kids don't fuck with me?..
I'm glad
Cause who the fuck am I ?
gone call myself trying to be a dad?
Done fought against abortions,
ain't ask if they wanted be here,
and never did I consider that without them meant the mirror
My kids without the me, that's unseen, but that's the real
And if they really was my end, then what the fuck I'm doing here?
I'm glad
Cause who the fuck am I ?
gone call myself trying to be a dad?
Done fought against abortions,
ain't ask if they wanted be here,
and never did I consider that without them meant the mirror
My kids without the me, that's unseen, but that's the real
And if they really was my end, then what the fuck I'm doing here?
#childhood
#loneliness
28 reads
0 Comments
Rose Vines
I was looking in my gold mirror.
Vines around it,rose bushes nearby.
With thorns,I did not know how or why.
The roses on the bushes are red.
Maybe if I had a prettier stem or better leaves.
And my needs feel like they haven't been read properly.
I always thought of myself as a flower.
But if I could be a red rose,I would have so much power.
Maybe if I did not have any thorns.
Or if I could remove my differences and horns.
Maybe if I dyed my petals red.
Would that make things better?
Alas,I hope...
Vines around it,rose bushes nearby.
With thorns,I did not know how or why.
The roses on the bushes are red.
Maybe if I had a prettier stem or better leaves.
And my needs feel like they haven't been read properly.
I always thought of myself as a flower.
But if I could be a red rose,I would have so much power.
Maybe if I did not have any thorns.
Or if I could remove my differences and horns.
Maybe if I dyed my petals red.
Would that make things better?
Alas,I hope...
#hope
#sadness
#uplifting
13 reads
0 Comments
HATE
I know you HATE me.
I know they HATE me.
I know everybody HATES me.
That's the way it's always been
And that's the way it'll always be.
50 years old and don't have a mfkn thing to show for it.
I don't own my place.
I don't own my car.
All i have is my job,dick & nuts
No love to call my own.
No love to love.
No love to adore.
Everyone HATES me.
My looks are to blame.
Not a handsome man.
I have nothing to offer anyone.
I can only offer what's in my heart.
Obviously nobody wants that.
I have no...
I know they HATE me.
I know everybody HATES me.
That's the way it's always been
And that's the way it'll always be.
50 years old and don't have a mfkn thing to show for it.
I don't own my place.
I don't own my car.
All i have is my job,dick & nuts
No love to call my own.
No love to love.
No love to adore.
Everyone HATES me.
My looks are to blame.
Not a handsome man.
I have nothing to offer anyone.
I can only offer what's in my heart.
Obviously nobody wants that.
I have no...
#hate
#love
28 reads
1 Comment
double take
the worst part of being
65 is that you don't worry
about relationships anymore
the best part of being
65 is that you don't worry
about relationships anymore
65 is that you don't worry
about relationships anymore
the best part of being
65 is that you don't worry
about relationships anymore
#funny
41 reads
9 Comments
Quantum
all it took for me to fall in love
was one chance, miraculous moment,
coinciding quite nicely with
a random rainy Tuesday afternoon;
the rundown yet quaint bookstore
provided the perfect intersection
between your day and mine;
I never believed in divine timing
until our eyes boldly introduced us,
spilling all our best-kept secrets
across the gardening aisle -
it was the most holy thing I’ve felt;
I still ponder the magnitude
of that small moment, a tiny seed
containing finely-detailed blueprint,
the structure of time...
was one chance, miraculous moment,
coinciding quite nicely with
a random rainy Tuesday afternoon;
the rundown yet quaint bookstore
provided the perfect intersection
between your day and mine;
I never believed in divine timing
until our eyes boldly introduced us,
spilling all our best-kept secrets
across the gardening aisle -
it was the most holy thing I’ve felt;
I still ponder the magnitude
of that small moment, a tiny seed
containing finely-detailed blueprint,
the structure of time...
#love
#NaPoWriMo2024
34 reads
4 Comments
Anchor
Sometimes you lose the anchor in your life
It’s sunk, disappeared at the bottom of the ocean
The most important person gone in a second
No air in your lungs, no wind in your sails
Your whole life changes
Just like that
It’s sunk, disappeared at the bottom of the ocean
The most important person gone in a second
No air in your lungs, no wind in your sails
Your whole life changes
Just like that
#death
#depression
#grief #sadness
#grief #sadness
55 reads
5 Comments
Gunpowder
A season in hell
does not enable anyone
for that dream vacation
in Paradise...
Non-appreciators
forgive me, but
my Vodka, when
is not in circulation
in my organism
it's very quiet
in the freezer...
Drugs for what?
The truth is so harsh
in the morning, as much as
it was before falling asleep.
does not enable anyone
for that dream vacation
in Paradise...
Non-appreciators
forgive me, but
my Vodka, when
is not in circulation
in my organism
it's very quiet
in the freezer...
Drugs for what?
The truth is so harsh
in the morning, as much as
it was before falling asleep.
#alcohol
#honesty
#mirror
#myself
#philosophical
40 reads
2 Comments
NO-ONE IN MY CORNER
Have you ever felt like you're in a boxing ring
You can hear the whole crowd cheering
Yet when you turn to look within your corner
There's no-one there to support you
~
You're there facing the fight alone
You're left trying to dodge each blow
Fainting from one side to the other
Hoping you won't be put upon the canvas
~
It feels like every round lasts forever
You're constantly waiting the safety of the bell
While taking one blow after another
With no-one there to throw in the towel
~
You're just praying to...
You can hear the whole crowd cheering
Yet when you turn to look within your corner
There's no-one there to support you
~
You're there facing the fight alone
You're left trying to dodge each blow
Fainting from one side to the other
Hoping you won't be put upon the canvas
~
It feels like every round lasts forever
You're constantly waiting the safety of the bell
While taking one blow after another
With no-one there to throw in the towel
~
You're just praying to...
#LifeStruggles
#myself
47 reads
4 Comments
Lent
the absolute is not there
the inconsistencies also do not
not even the most microscopic of faults
the tremor of the earth is not felt
and the wind, where did the wind go, in silence?
the sound of the waves fell silent on the rocks
the stillness of the rocks shook the sands
and the desert turned sour under the sun
and the voice, where did the voice go, screaming?
the color of things is not there
the scars are not there either
but the scream is the sound of everything that moves
the infinitesimal of calculations was...
the inconsistencies also do not
not even the most microscopic of faults
the tremor of the earth is not felt
and the wind, where did the wind go, in silence?
the sound of the waves fell silent on the rocks
the stillness of the rocks shook the sands
and the desert turned sour under the sun
and the voice, where did the voice go, screaming?
the color of things is not there
the scars are not there either
but the scream is the sound of everything that moves
the infinitesimal of calculations was...
#anxiety
#apathy
#boredom
#depression
#desert
32 reads
2 Comments
Nobody Knows
She lives in the icy draft of the hollow
Stands tall in the deep and loves into
Shallow nightmares they creep and
Screams in the pillow as the paint's
Deep and weeping like willow she dance
In the dark like a silhouette burns
Through the evening like a cigarette
Tally's up a wrist and attempt to forget
But not one cut with his deepest regret
Heart locked in a pretty box ribbon
Cages beauty over shadow by the beast
That rages an open book of empty pages
She wears one mask with all the faces
Got the kiss of a...
Stands tall in the deep and loves into
Shallow nightmares they creep and
Screams in the pillow as the paint's
Deep and weeping like willow she dance
In the dark like a silhouette burns
Through the evening like a cigarette
Tally's up a wrist and attempt to forget
But not one cut with his deepest regret
Heart locked in a pretty box ribbon
Cages beauty over shadow by the beast
That rages an open book of empty pages
She wears one mask with all the faces
Got the kiss of a...
#myself
36 reads
2 Comments
Beware
Let me give it
To you straight
If you wish
to speak to me
As soon as I awake
You'll have to wait
For Heaven's sake
No one, not even
My precious pup
Will interact with me
Until I drink
My first cup of coffee
So, if you don't wish
To hear me moan
And let out a groan
You'd be wise
To hang up
That darn cell phone
And leave my
Cranky self alone
To you straight
If you wish
to speak to me
As soon as I awake
You'll have to wait
For Heaven's sake
No one, not even
My precious pup
Will interact with me
Until I drink
My first cup of coffee
So, if you don't wish
To hear me moan
And let out a groan
You'd be wise
To hang up
That darn cell phone
And leave my
Cranky self alone
#coffee
#curse
#morning #relationships
#morning #relationships
55 reads
13 Comments
DU Poetry : Personal Poems Seeking Critique. Poetry about Self Reflection and Self Awareness. (Page 2)