Lyrics Seeking Honest Critique
#lyrics
Related Theme
#music
lyrics seeking honest critique. Honest feedback has been requested for these poems.
oldmanG
Poem Published
12th Nov 2024 4:07pm
12th Nov 2024 4:07pm
Mining Me
Mining Me
Like a miner
With a pick axe
Pieces of memory
Below is unearthed goods
Feeling for the fault line
Coal car on the rails
Carry away my pain
Leave me with deep pools
Of deep thoughts
Letting the world see
Everything
Sifting and with a pan
Looking for gold
In my head
Can’t put it down fast enough
Coursing through my being
Wake up in the night
Tap a few out on my iPhone
Need something for the people
Builds in my head ...
Like a miner
With a pick axe
Pieces of memory
Below is unearthed goods
Feeling for the fault line
Coal car on the rails
Carry away my pain
Leave me with deep pools
Of deep thoughts
Letting the world see
Everything
Sifting and with a pan
Looking for gold
In my head
Can’t put it down fast enough
Coursing through my being
Wake up in the night
Tap a few out on my iPhone
Need something for the people
Builds in my head ...
#LifeAsAWriter
#lyrics
#music #MyInspiration
#music #MyInspiration
39 reads
0 Comments
Vision_of_insanity
Poem Published
11th Nov 2024 12:18pm
11th Nov 2024 12:18pm
Slapping my pecker
#dirty
#family
#funny
#lyrics
#sex
172 reads
2 Comments
Vision_of_insanity
Poem Published
11th Nov 2024 12:14pm
11th Nov 2024 12:14pm
Within My Heart
Numerous times when I look or hear about people being lonely
I have a feeling of sadness deep inside
It makes me wonder if I would have been alone, before I found you
What would happen if you turned around and said goodbye
Honey it's you
you're what I'm living for
I have it all, nothing more
right from the start when I found you
Baby it's you
you were the one for me
the one who's been making me see
the world with you is such a brighter place
I now realize it's you
you are my brightest star
whether you're...
I have a feeling of sadness deep inside
It makes me wonder if I would have been alone, before I found you
What would happen if you turned around and said goodbye
Honey it's you
you're what I'm living for
I have it all, nothing more
right from the start when I found you
Baby it's you
you were the one for me
the one who's been making me see
the world with you is such a brighter place
I now realize it's you
you are my brightest star
whether you're...
#loneliness
#love
#lyrics
#relationships
#romantic
118 reads
6 Comments
Vision_of_insanity
Poem Published
10th Nov 2024 11:49am
10th Nov 2024 11:49am
Fear
You can drive a car if you do it right
but you can't go far if it puts you out of sight
you can't look at girls
you can't drink anything
you got to get your kicks in the shadow of fear
You stay out late when they think your young
when they find out, there gonna want you hung
so you try to understand that you might get near
cause your lost alone in the shadow of fear
So you found a chick that you think is fine
but you fell too fast so you lost your mind
society looks, but they turn their ears
you got to get...
but you can't go far if it puts you out of sight
you can't look at girls
you can't drink anything
you got to get your kicks in the shadow of fear
You stay out late when they think your young
when they find out, there gonna want you hung
so you try to understand that you might get near
cause your lost alone in the shadow of fear
So you found a chick that you think is fine
but you fell too fast so you lost your mind
society looks, but they turn their ears
you got to get...
#FeelingTrapped
#lyrics
#rebellion
#rhyming
#shadows
56 reads
7 Comments
oldmanG
Poem Published
10th Nov 2024 10:51am
10th Nov 2024 10:51am
Final Four for my Soul
Ball n tunes vs smoke n alcohol (Final Four for my soul)
Epic battle like Tyson vs Ali
Goliath and David
In the garden
Who wins will decide my soul
Rooting for bball but alcohol calls me
Back in to swim and lose myself
Find my way to the surface
Hearing tunes of dolphins
Smell skunk on the horizon
Sink into oblivion
Clear brain can’t find a word
To put together
Spirit’s figure it out
Playin leather and pulling strings
Are things of Buddha beings
...
Epic battle like Tyson vs Ali
Goliath and David
In the garden
Who wins will decide my soul
Rooting for bball but alcohol calls me
Back in to swim and lose myself
Find my way to the surface
Hearing tunes of dolphins
Smell skunk on the horizon
Sink into oblivion
Clear brain can’t find a word
To put together
Spirit’s figure it out
Playin leather and pulling strings
Are things of Buddha beings
...
#lyrics
#marijuana
#music #sports
#music #sports
43 reads
0 Comments
oldmanG
Poem Published
6th Nov 2024 3:19am
6th Nov 2024 3:19am
Dragon Train
Dragon Train
Ride the dragon train
Till he tosses you off
Hit a bump thought it was a hiccup
Breathing fire through my veins
Try and put a collar on this dragon
Cinch it tight maybe some boulders will hold me down
Hear a rumble in the distance
Four Horsemen thundering down
Get closer and it’s clearer
Bass drum and guitar
The life of my love
Thought I wouldn’t fit in
But I can’t deny my true passion
An assassin on the court
Love tickling the twine
But my true sport is...
Ride the dragon train
Till he tosses you off
Hit a bump thought it was a hiccup
Breathing fire through my veins
Try and put a collar on this dragon
Cinch it tight maybe some boulders will hold me down
Hear a rumble in the distance
Four Horsemen thundering down
Get closer and it’s clearer
Bass drum and guitar
The life of my love
Thought I wouldn’t fit in
But I can’t deny my true passion
An assassin on the court
Love tickling the twine
But my true sport is...
#lyrics
#music
#myself
51 reads
0 Comments
oldmanG
Poem Published
1st Nov 2024 00:07am
1st Nov 2024 00:07am
I Quit the P.O.
I quit the P.O.
I QUIT the Post Office near me
To stand on a stage in a seedy corner of town not far from here
The P.O. paid my bills gave me (almost) middle class
Kept a roof over and paid all the bills
Even had enough to spend on the kids
What was I thinking I can’t pay for schooling
Playing in a dive bar
I quit the P O to pursue my dreams
Wake up look around at the damage I’ve done
Hope to wake up drunk on a rock star yacht
Forget about the damage I’ve done
The kids have the best...
I QUIT the Post Office near me
To stand on a stage in a seedy corner of town not far from here
The P.O. paid my bills gave me (almost) middle class
Kept a roof over and paid all the bills
Even had enough to spend on the kids
What was I thinking I can’t pay for schooling
Playing in a dive bar
I quit the P O to pursue my dreams
Wake up look around at the damage I’ve done
Hope to wake up drunk on a rock star yacht
Forget about the damage I’ve done
The kids have the best...
#choices
#identity
#job
#lyrics
#music
44 reads
0 Comments
oldmanG
Poem Published
30th Oct 2024 4:18am
30th Oct 2024 4:18am
Book of Me
Book of Me
I write a book of songs
But I’m writing a song
Wordy too early in the morning
How about shut up and let your words walk
Pearls of a hit all I have to do is
Let my words breathe and reflect me
Instead of stepping on my creativity
Allow thoughts to step in between
I write a book of songs but all I need is
Something concise and real pretty
Now we’re on Jimmy Kimmel hope I don’t
Fuck up on live Tv , but I can fake it real good
So now I’m in...
I write a book of songs
But I’m writing a song
Wordy too early in the morning
How about shut up and let your words walk
Pearls of a hit all I have to do is
Let my words breathe and reflect me
Instead of stepping on my creativity
Allow thoughts to step in between
I write a book of songs but all I need is
Something concise and real pretty
Now we’re on Jimmy Kimmel hope I don’t
Fuck up on live Tv , but I can fake it real good
So now I’m in...
#DeepUndergroundPoetry
#inspirational
#lyrics
#music
#passion
59 reads
0 Comments
billywaise
Billy Waise
Billy Waise
Poem Published
19th Oct 2024 1:25pm
19th Oct 2024 1:25pm
1:19 A.M.
#lyrics
37 reads
0 Comments
PoetSpeak
Poem Published
14th Oct 2024 5:25pm
14th Oct 2024 5:25pm
Listening to the Highway Men
Singing the song Highwayman
Willie Nelson
Kris Kristofferson
Waylon Jennings
Johnny Cash
One left on this fair earth
Iconic
I love Johnny Cash and Willie Nelson
Cloth comes to mind ...
Willie Nelson
Kris Kristofferson
Waylon Jennings
Johnny Cash
One left on this fair earth
Iconic
I love Johnny Cash and Willie Nelson
Cloth comes to mind ...
#emotions
#identity
#LifeCycle
#lyrics
#music
143 reads
20 Comments
I_was_rare_once
RareFaction
RareFaction
Poem Published
11th Oct 2024 4:51am
11th Oct 2024 4:51am
No kidding!
So i got a lot of defects.
A lot of thought processes i reject.
Honestly to me it doesn't make sense.
(No kidding)
All these things to me will make sense.
(No kidding)
Tell me something I don't already know or tell me something I don't already know.
(No kidding)
Tell me something I don't already know or tell me something I don't already know.
I want to make my my own choice(s).
Drive my broke car like its a Rolls-Royce.
Go where i want and not where i have no point.
Do what is right because its my own joy.
Not have...
A lot of thought processes i reject.
Honestly to me it doesn't make sense.
(No kidding)
All these things to me will make sense.
(No kidding)
Tell me something I don't already know or tell me something I don't already know.
(No kidding)
Tell me something I don't already know or tell me something I don't already know.
I want to make my my own choice(s).
Drive my broke car like its a Rolls-Royce.
Go where i want and not where i have no point.
Do what is right because its my own joy.
Not have...
#apathy
#boredom
#lyrics
69 reads
0 Comments
Vision_of_insanity
Poem Published
10th Oct 2024 7:34pm
10th Oct 2024 7:34pm
You gotta stop now
When your down low,
and you don't know, Which end is up
You got to stop now,
think about how, Which end is up
You got plans now, and I got mine
If you don't love me babe, don't waste my time
You can't say that you really love me, Which end is up
You can try to but you can't see, Which end is up
I know what your gonna say
you say you don't love me
This time I'm not gonna stay
I'm gonna turn my back & walk away... from you
You gonna stop now,
and think about me, Which end is up
and you don't know, Which end is up
You got to stop now,
think about how, Which end is up
You got plans now, and I got mine
If you don't love me babe, don't waste my time
You can't say that you really love me, Which end is up
You can try to but you can't see, Which end is up
I know what your gonna say
you say you don't love me
This time I'm not gonna stay
I'm gonna turn my back & walk away... from you
You gonna stop now,
and think about me, Which end is up
#breakup
#girlfriend
#love
#lyrics
#MovingOn
104 reads
4 Comments
DU Poetry : Lyrics Seeking Honest Critique
