Limerick Seeking Friendly Advice Poems
#limerick
"There's A Bear In The Park?"
There was a young Art In The Park
Whose bite, was Worse than it's bark!
One day on the green
A life model was seen
Declaring "It's only for a bit of a lark!"
by Jemia
Whose bite, was Worse than it's bark!
One day on the green
A life model was seen
Declaring "It's only for a bit of a lark!"
by Jemia
#limerick
#funny
119 reads
0 Comments
Annie and Frank
Annie Oakley was quite a good shot
And old photos reveal, she was hot
Cowboys hit on poor Ann
But that gun in her hand
Kept those randy dudes clear of her slot!
When a cowpoke got drunk on some beer
And then grabbed Annie’s tight derriere
She drew down on his crotch
And as everyone watched—
Annie turned that dude into a steer!
But that was before she met Frank—
Famous marksman with coin in the bank!
Annie saw, he was hung
So she ‘holstered’ his ‘gun’—
Then she taught him to ride her ‘bare-back!’
...
And old photos reveal, she was hot
Cowboys hit on poor Ann
But that gun in her hand
Kept those randy dudes clear of her slot!
When a cowpoke got drunk on some beer
And then grabbed Annie’s tight derriere
She drew down on his crotch
And as everyone watched—
Annie turned that dude into a steer!
But that was before she met Frank—
Famous marksman with coin in the bank!
Annie saw, he was hung
So she ‘holstered’ his ‘gun’—
Then she taught him to ride her ‘bare-back!’
...
#sex
#limerick
#funny
234 reads
4 Comments
Ant I Thesis!
I once knew an ant, called Brilli
Who was born, it is said, in Caerphilly
She found it a squeeze
When she got cheese on her knees
Brilli Ant was actually quite silly
by Jemia
Who was born, it is said, in Caerphilly
She found it a squeeze
When she got cheese on her knees
Brilli Ant was actually quite silly
by Jemia
#limerick
#funny
276 reads
0 Comments
The place where limericks go to die*
Honoria
In the underground kingdom called Moria,
I first came across this great warrior.
Her weapon? The pen—
it can pierce beasts and men.
Her name? It's the lovely Honoria!
Her
I gathered up Mary and K,
and we all headed out to the bay.
A trio of gingers
as stealthy as ninjas,
that's something not seen every day!
Cipher_O
In the heart of the deep underground,
a mystical poet is found.
His words are quite few,
but such meaning shines through;
he always...
In the underground kingdom called Moria,
I first came across this great warrior.
Her weapon? The pen—
it can pierce beasts and men.
Her name? It's the lovely Honoria!
Her
I gathered up Mary and K,
and we all headed out to the bay.
A trio of gingers
as stealthy as ninjas,
that's something not seen every day!
Cipher_O
In the heart of the deep underground,
a mystical poet is found.
His words are quite few,
but such meaning shines through;
he always...
#friendship
#limerick
#funny
391 reads
14 Comments
Limerick Collection 3
brokentitanium
I have a friend, brokentitanium,
with hair like a coral geranium.
She writes, plays and sings,
and much happiness brings.
She's so well endowed in her cranium.
Brains AND beauty!
The most gorgeous man on DUP
has just paid a visit to me!
His hair's long and wavy;
his eyes blue (not navy);
he also writes great poetry!
I have a friend, brokentitanium,
with hair like a coral geranium.
She writes, plays and sings,
and much happiness brings.
She's so well endowed in her cranium.
Brains AND beauty!
The most gorgeous man on DUP
has just paid a visit to me!
His hair's long and wavy;
his eyes blue (not navy);
he also writes great poetry!
#friendship
#limerick
#funny
426 reads
8 Comments
LimerElla
There once was a student named Ella
moving house with a girl and two fellas
They needed a van
so I said “yes I can”
and that started me on this novella
They departed a two storey flat
to move in with a boy and a cat
There were so many stairs
I’m now having nightmares
about falling and going kersplat
You might wonder why I’d be at peace
lugging boxes all day without cease
Though the work was unpaid
I was pleased to give aid
for this Ella is my darling niece
moving house with a girl and two fellas
They needed a van
so I said “yes I can”
and that started me on this novella
They departed a two storey flat
to move in with a boy and a cat
There were so many stairs
I’m now having nightmares
about falling and going kersplat
You might wonder why I’d be at peace
lugging boxes all day without cease
Though the work was unpaid
I was pleased to give aid
for this Ella is my darling niece
#family
#limerick
#NaPoWriMo2022
271 reads
4 Comments
Rohmcom
There once was a nazi Ernst Rohm
Who conducted his evils with aplomb
The fact he was gay
Held very little sway
As his man-dates went down like a bomb
by Jemia (&Lili)
Who conducted his evils with aplomb
The fact he was gay
Held very little sway
As his man-dates went down like a bomb
by Jemia (&Lili)
#dark
#limerick
#historical
213 reads
3 Comments
A Lady Of Hastings (Limerick!)
There was a young lady of Hastings
Who tried some artistic pastings
It went all askew
When she got covered in glue
That stuck up lady of Hastings
by Jemia
Who tried some artistic pastings
It went all askew
When she got covered in glue
That stuck up lady of Hastings
by Jemia
#limerick
#funny
255 reads
0 Comments
"JUST NOT CRICKET!"
There once was a man, John Tricket
Whom had trouble holding on to his wicket
He found a large lump
Which he mistook for his stump
And didn't quite know where to stick it!
Whom had trouble holding on to his wicket
He found a large lump
Which he mistook for his stump
And didn't quite know where to stick it!
#limerick
#funny
#sports
275 reads
0 Comments
Was It The Dublin Coddle
( going out on a Limerick )
There once was a copper named Bart
‘Twas famous the way he could fart,
Locals thought it obscene
How he’d pile on the beans,
The crowd all said ‘He must be smart!’
He seemed to be bless’d from the start
Bart turned pooting into an art,
So on St Paddy’s Day
We were happy and gay,
A party there’d be a la carte.
The town planners made it a gift
And foot the bill due to the thrift,
All the ladies would make
Shepherd’s pie,...
There once was a copper named Bart
‘Twas famous the way he could fart,
Locals thought it obscene
How he’d pile on the beans,
The crowd all said ‘He must be smart!’
He seemed to be bless’d from the start
Bart turned pooting into an art,
So on St Paddy’s Day
We were happy and gay,
A party there’d be a la carte.
The town planners made it a gift
And foot the bill due to the thrift,
All the ladies would make
Shepherd’s pie,...
#food
#limerick
#funny
#culture
#tradition
664 reads
20 Comments
CunFronted
#limerick
#funny
#dirty
734 reads
5 Comments
Sex On The Brain
#BDSM
#limerick
#funny
924 reads
6 Comments
DU Poetry : Limerick Seeking Friendly Advice Poems