Poems About Emptiness Seeking Honest Critique
#emptiness
Poems about emptiness seeking honest critique. Honest feedback has been requested for these poems.
The draining of the Day
My soul is drained of all hope and light.
A dark void lurks and keeps me company.
Creeping in the cracks I showed over time,
It is trying to take me over completely.
Darker and grimmer my days become,
Slowly and surely killing the joy I once had.
Sadness, pain, my mind has reached its limit,
The constant chatter and noise drives me mad.
I’ve shown my weakness to it, it knows where to hurt,
He has shown me the way out, I know where to go.
The way is clear and my intentions are justified.
Now It’s only, when and how will I...
A dark void lurks and keeps me company.
Creeping in the cracks I showed over time,
It is trying to take me over completely.
Darker and grimmer my days become,
Slowly and surely killing the joy I once had.
Sadness, pain, my mind has reached its limit,
The constant chatter and noise drives me mad.
I’ve shown my weakness to it, it knows where to hurt,
He has shown me the way out, I know where to go.
The way is clear and my intentions are justified.
Now It’s only, when and how will I...
#sadness
#depression
#dark
#MentalHealth
#emptiness
31 reads
1 Comment
Empty Holster
I think I've lost my sense of self,
no conniving inner monologue persisting,
maybe that's a good thing
is what societies insisting.
But I kinda miss ill wishes
behind eyes glistening and near misses,
when I've spoken hiding concealed fists
I've only dismissed as reality hits me.
Now I'm not sure that I even get me..
Empty headed, not a lot of new paint
tends to stick to this pallet,
the old is wearing thin, throat scorched
and singed from singing the same old ballads.
I'm stuck, dumb as a truck,
now I see my old...
no conniving inner monologue persisting,
maybe that's a good thing
is what societies insisting.
But I kinda miss ill wishes
behind eyes glistening and near misses,
when I've spoken hiding concealed fists
I've only dismissed as reality hits me.
Now I'm not sure that I even get me..
Empty headed, not a lot of new paint
tends to stick to this pallet,
the old is wearing thin, throat scorched
and singed from singing the same old ballads.
I'm stuck, dumb as a truck,
now I see my old...
#emptiness
24 reads
0 Comments
Frayed Souls
Meek pawns of history fear only to dare
Subservient, failures of noble pretences
Discontent seeps into the misled who err
Trivial burdens alleviate one's lost senses
Subtle endeavours glide over troubled skies
As dispair looms beyond a valley of tragedy
It rises from the remnants of its own demise
A callous void etched in the stones of apathy
See the adamant fall, condemned to regress
Chiseled into the pale silence of nothingness
Subservient, failures of noble pretences
Discontent seeps into the misled who err
Trivial burdens alleviate one's lost senses
Subtle endeavours glide over troubled skies
As dispair looms beyond a valley of tragedy
It rises from the remnants of its own demise
A callous void etched in the stones of apathy
See the adamant fall, condemned to regress
Chiseled into the pale silence of nothingness
#regret
#misunderstood
#frustration
#disappointment
#emptiness
47 reads
0 Comments
Catsong
~ Written on the 24th of October 2008 ~~
A never-ending autumn is living in my head.
My soul's empty and my world is blackened.
I'm living in a desert, and a desert's living in,
It feels like the song of the lonely wind,
like the birds on the live wire, like a strange drawing.
It looks like I'm staying, but actually I'm crawling.
I'm far away from people, I live in a different place.
There's ghost mist in my soul and mist in my face.
Deeper is my pleasure, deeper are my feelings,
I'm just a living sleeper, a paper doll who...
A never-ending autumn is living in my head.
My soul's empty and my world is blackened.
I'm living in a desert, and a desert's living in,
It feels like the song of the lonely wind,
like the birds on the live wire, like a strange drawing.
It looks like I'm staying, but actually I'm crawling.
I'm far away from people, I live in a different place.
There's ghost mist in my soul and mist in my face.
Deeper is my pleasure, deeper are my feelings,
I'm just a living sleeper, a paper doll who...
#loneliness
#cats
#tragedy
#despair
#emptiness
40 reads
0 Comments
that dark night
It is early in the morning
Late at night,
A mid-November night
In late September.
The dog sleeps,
Wet and muddied,
A musty stench
From his midnight feasting
On something too long dead
Beyond resurrection.
All is a whirlwind of blue-skinned
Krishna dancing in a vortex
Or Kokopeli hunching in the rain
Over a Kali Ma
Flute of bone
Of questionable provenance.
My words cower in the shadow
Of my inner jail
Doing time for unspecified offenses.
Even as the soybeans ripen,
Sodden in ...
Late at night,
A mid-November night
In late September.
The dog sleeps,
Wet and muddied,
A musty stench
From his midnight feasting
On something too long dead
Beyond resurrection.
All is a whirlwind of blue-skinned
Krishna dancing in a vortex
Or Kokopeli hunching in the rain
Over a Kali Ma
Flute of bone
Of questionable provenance.
My words cower in the shadow
Of my inner jail
Doing time for unspecified offenses.
Even as the soybeans ripen,
Sodden in ...
#depression
#dark
#death
#emptiness
#apathy
42 reads
0 Comments
Another cut
Right as the rain
Am I really though.
Clothed in pain.
Half tattered soul.
Is what it is
Just another notch in the belt
Another line running my wrist.
So much it's no longer felt.
Bath water blatant red.
Feeling woozy light in head.
Lay back enjoy this poem
Remember what I've said.
Am I really though.
Clothed in pain.
Half tattered soul.
Is what it is
Just another notch in the belt
Another line running my wrist.
So much it's no longer felt.
Bath water blatant red.
Feeling woozy light in head.
Lay back enjoy this poem
Remember what I've said.
#anxiety
#hate
#grief
#despair
#emptiness
76 reads
1 Comment
Hopes Of Emptiness
The pot so beautiful is now shattered like a wine glass.
The paint had been worked on for years.
Now it's destroyed by fears.
The paint had been wiped by the tears she shed.
Maybe even all the promises she kept.
She could no longer keep it in her head.
And so an explosion of monsters and fears was made.
Wiping the smiles off people she had once loved.
Wiping the memories of the ones she still loved.
All of a sudden,they started acting strange.
Smiles and laughter is something they could no longer exchange.
And...
The paint had been worked on for years.
Now it's destroyed by fears.
The paint had been wiped by the tears she shed.
Maybe even all the promises she kept.
She could no longer keep it in her head.
And so an explosion of monsters and fears was made.
Wiping the smiles off people she had once loved.
Wiping the memories of the ones she still loved.
All of a sudden,they started acting strange.
Smiles and laughter is something they could no longer exchange.
And...
#depression
#betrayal
#emptiness
47 reads
0 Comments
I just can’t
A world, stable and solid,
Suddenly wrecked and destroyed.
A place where I felt safe and significant,
Forever lost to the void.
Change in management,
A new direction, a fresh start.
But not for me, not for this future,
In this drama, I won’t play my part.
On this stage my safe haven will shatter.
Crumbling, tearing are the walls I once built,
I can’t step into the light, with my thoughts so dark.
I’ll remain stuck with my everlasting guilt.
Suddenly wrecked and destroyed.
A place where I felt safe and significant,
Forever lost to the void.
Change in management,
A new direction, a fresh start.
But not for me, not for this future,
In this drama, I won’t play my part.
On this stage my safe haven will shatter.
Crumbling, tearing are the walls I once built,
I can’t step into the light, with my thoughts so dark.
I’ll remain stuck with my everlasting guilt.
#anxiety
#depression
#loneliness
#FeelingLost
#emptiness
97 reads
2 Comments
Red Fish...Blue Fish
I do not like it here
I do like it there...
I do not like it here
do not like
it's taste
it's color
it's sound
I do not like it here
I do not like
it's feel
it's smell
do not like it's hurt
I do not like it here
there is where
I want to be
I do not like it here
I do like it there...
I do not like it here
do not like
it's taste
it's color
it's sound
I do not like it here
I do not like
it's feel
it's smell
do not like it's hurt
I do not like it here
there is where
I want to be
I do not like it here
#frustration
#emptiness
37 reads
2 Comments
Neutral Extremest

#love
#dark
#death #emptiness
#death #emptiness
25 reads
0 Comments
Marching.
I am numb,
A mannequin painted by my own indecision,
And dressed by my lack of vision,
Destined to resent and regret,
Passive and uninspired.
But I march with an army,
Of faceless and distant bodies.
Each a hollow shell,
Mindless wonderers,
Vacant and idle.
And the gunfire rings on,
As I take step after step,
Looking past the horizon,
Seemingly steady and apparently unfazed.
But I am not there,
Absorbed in drowning out the voices,
Hopeless in their pursuit to wake me,
Begging me to address my sorrows, ...
A mannequin painted by my own indecision,
And dressed by my lack of vision,
Destined to resent and regret,
Passive and uninspired.
But I march with an army,
Of faceless and distant bodies.
Each a hollow shell,
Mindless wonderers,
Vacant and idle.
And the gunfire rings on,
As I take step after step,
Looking past the horizon,
Seemingly steady and apparently unfazed.
But I am not there,
Absorbed in drowning out the voices,
Hopeless in their pursuit to wake me,
Begging me to address my sorrows, ...
#loneliness
#emptiness
#apathy
49 reads
0 Comments
I’m Disposable
Without motivation
Where is the strength
For me to move
Without motivation
I find myself
Sitting still
No progress
No want
I find myself
Slowly withering away
Hidden within
Material things
I bought for
My security blanket
What people see
They believe
Everything is good
While I
Is torn up inside
No love
Or one person
Can break me away
From these dark feelings
Constantly swirling
Within my head
My pride
Won’t let me
Tell all
To someone...
Where is the strength
For me to move
Without motivation
I find myself
Sitting still
No progress
No want
I find myself
Slowly withering away
Hidden within
Material things
I bought for
My security blanket
What people see
They believe
Everything is good
While I
Is torn up inside
No love
Or one person
Can break me away
From these dark feelings
Constantly swirling
Within my head
My pride
Won’t let me
Tell all
To someone...
#depression
#dark
#FeelingLost #emptiness
#FeelingLost #emptiness
67 reads
1 Comment
DU Poetry : Poems About Emptiness Seeking Honest Critique