Breakup Seeking Honest Critique Poems
#breakup
breakup seeking honest critique poems. Honest feedback has been requested for these poems.
DreamIllusions
Poem Published
30th Nov 2022 7:12pm
30th Nov 2022 7:12pm
HATE
When did you
Become so full of hate
That you chewed up
Spit out
Everything with the weight
Of us
Become so full of hate
That you chewed up
Spit out
Everything with the weight
Of us
#sadness
#breakup
#disappointment
#revenge
#bittersweet
46 reads
0 Comments
nervsy
nervs.
nervs.
Poem Published
9th Nov 2022 4:45am
9th Nov 2022 4:45am
You Found Me
I found me and I guess you found me too
I put my best foot forward that day, knots in my stomach and all.
You’d come from so far to get your head straight. Was it the benzos or the leg mutilations that got you here, I forget, but that’s besides the point.
I was secretly hoping you’d come here, maybe Malibu or something. I was so happy you chose to be so close, Woodland Hills!
A few minutes from my work. God I’m nervous writing about this even years after the fact.
My friend teased me so much that day. She wanted to meet you but my anxiety was too high. I know she’d...
I put my best foot forward that day, knots in my stomach and all.
You’d come from so far to get your head straight. Was it the benzos or the leg mutilations that got you here, I forget, but that’s besides the point.
I was secretly hoping you’d come here, maybe Malibu or something. I was so happy you chose to be so close, Woodland Hills!
A few minutes from my work. God I’m nervous writing about this even years after the fact.
My friend teased me so much that day. She wanted to meet you but my anxiety was too high. I know she’d...
#sadness
#depression
#breakup
#despair
#healing
67 reads
0 Comments
lovestonedfaery
Poem Published
8th Nov 2022 6:44pm
8th Nov 2022 6:44pm
ending lines
hey"
it's been a while.
you sounded somewhat cheerful,
acting in place
as if you picked up your smile.
you knew I've had it,
with the lame tricks that I found.
said it nicely,
politely,
that you will get up from the ground
or you would have to leave this house.
because you're in the drain and think that it's ok in stealing my energy,
you're draining me,
with your complaining
of all this misery,
about how you don't need saving
but you're hanging on to me.
cutting into my...
it's been a while.
you sounded somewhat cheerful,
acting in place
as if you picked up your smile.
you knew I've had it,
with the lame tricks that I found.
said it nicely,
politely,
that you will get up from the ground
or you would have to leave this house.
because you're in the drain and think that it's ok in stealing my energy,
you're draining me,
with your complaining
of all this misery,
about how you don't need saving
but you're hanging on to me.
cutting into my...
#love
#breakup
#conflict
#friendship
#MovingOn
74 reads
3 Comments
Gahddess_Worship
Poem Published
8th Nov 2022 4:48pm
8th Nov 2022 4:48pm
Pitiful, Just Plain Pitiful
The honeymooners ebulliently chat
having breakfast in an Inn’s café
spying a geriatric couple in another booth
eating in silence
never glancing the other’s way
newlyweds replete with optimistic youth
say “we’ll never become like that…
we’ll love each other come what may”
Fast forward 29 years
middle-aged man sits alone
having breakfast in an Inn’s café
digesting thoughts of regret and fears
remembers the aged, stoic pair
viewing their state in a different way
however dispassionate they appeared
at the very least...
having breakfast in an Inn’s café
spying a geriatric couple in another booth
eating in silence
never glancing the other’s way
newlyweds replete with optimistic youth
say “we’ll never become like that…
we’ll love each other come what may”
Fast forward 29 years
middle-aged man sits alone
having breakfast in an Inn’s café
digesting thoughts of regret and fears
remembers the aged, stoic pair
viewing their state in a different way
however dispassionate they appeared
at the very least...
#sadness
#regret
#loneliness #breakup
#loneliness #breakup
90 reads
16 Comments
Tina2020
Tina Delaney
Tina Delaney
Poem Published
7th Nov 2022 10:20pm
7th Nov 2022 10:20pm
Should I
She says she loves you, but she's wired to the moon
She wants a baby, but you think it's way too soon
She does have something, but it could be just lust
Her bedroom habits are all men's must
She is sweet, she is kind, but your parents won't care
She has deep cut wounds and her bright coloured hair
What should you do it's so hard to decide
You know that she care's but has something deep to hide
Her secrets are deep, and she cares not to share them
He once was her life, but he deeply betrayed her
A much younger model with such a nice figure ...
She wants a baby, but you think it's way too soon
She does have something, but it could be just lust
Her bedroom habits are all men's must
She is sweet, she is kind, but your parents won't care
She has deep cut wounds and her bright coloured hair
What should you do it's so hard to decide
You know that she care's but has something deep to hide
Her secrets are deep, and she cares not to share them
He once was her life, but he deeply betrayed her
A much younger model with such a nice figure ...
#love
#boyfriend
#men
#breakup
#lover
77 reads
0 Comments
Fishmander
Poem Published
6th Nov 2022 7:51pm
6th Nov 2022 7:51pm
Ruin
Alone in your dream confined
No hope or need to lie
A chance meeting exorcised
You're my lucid alibi
You make me want to be your waste
Drown in your breath, breathe in the taste
You make me feel like I can't escape
The way you graze this empty grave
We're swept up within the tide
Crash down and lift us high
Ruin me in and outside
You're the peace I leave behind.
No hope or need to lie
A chance meeting exorcised
You're my lucid alibi
You make me want to be your waste
Drown in your breath, breathe in the taste
You make me feel like I can't escape
The way you graze this empty grave
We're swept up within the tide
Crash down and lift us high
Ruin me in and outside
You're the peace I leave behind.
#dark
#relationships
#breakup #FallingInLove
#breakup #FallingInLove
109 reads
0 Comments
Abracadabra
Poem Published
2nd Nov 2022 5:08pm
2nd Nov 2022 5:08pm
Too Many Legs
He broke the lock
on the door to her heart
then laughed with the crowd
and danced like a drunk
as he threw out the key
She sang
'Que sera sera'
said from now on
her door would always stay open
if accepting his token for love
was the way it must be
Exploiting her innocence
he knew she had no defense
to counter his false pretense
no words would shield her against
their future he could not foresee
For company she whispers
in the mirror
and every sunset burns the same
braiding...
on the door to her heart
then laughed with the crowd
and danced like a drunk
as he threw out the key
She sang
'Que sera sera'
said from now on
her door would always stay open
if accepting his token for love
was the way it must be
Exploiting her innocence
he knew she had no defense
to counter his false pretense
no words would shield her against
their future he could not foresee
For company she whispers
in the mirror
and every sunset burns the same
braiding...
#relationships
#breakup
#UnrequitedLove
70 reads
0 Comments
DiaryoftheNow
Poem Published
1st Nov 2022 11:41am
1st Nov 2022 11:41am
Orthogonal Chance
When your pale skin touches a fervent glance,
When gardens grow in my pupils like string,
I will recall an orthogonal chance,
The one where the ego tasted death’s sting.
Rotten flesh filled the deep sleeping bedroom,
I danced in hell’s gallows as the smoke rose,
Omens rang out like a Locrian doom;
Like a megaphone made of syrinx’s woes.
Though I still dream of those sassafras sighs;
Though the asylum of musty breath remains;
Though I am undone by what it denies;
Though you can still see the indigo stains:
I must...
When gardens grow in my pupils like string,
I will recall an orthogonal chance,
The one where the ego tasted death’s sting.
Rotten flesh filled the deep sleeping bedroom,
I danced in hell’s gallows as the smoke rose,
Omens rang out like a Locrian doom;
Like a megaphone made of syrinx’s woes.
Though I still dream of those sassafras sighs;
Though the asylum of musty breath remains;
Though I am undone by what it denies;
Though you can still see the indigo stains:
I must...
#breakup
#surreal
#symbolism
54 reads
3 Comments
Nizana
Poem Published
27th Oct 2022 6:18pm
27th Oct 2022 6:18pm
The Dresser Mirror
The Dresser Mirror
An excerpt from my poetry book.
An excerpt from my poetry book.
#breakup
#SelfReflection
162 reads
7 Comments
PittinixDesigns
Poem Published
27th Oct 2022 1:01am
27th Oct 2022 1:01am
How Did I Lose Her Again?
The first time Olia broke up with me, I felt as if my life was over.
I thought love had ended for her and me, but good fortune was on my side.
After about two years had passed, she tried to rekindle our love.
I couldn’t believe it when Olia called me and said she wanted to see me.
When I went to Olia’s apartment, she could sense my uneasiness.
She spoke to me kindly and she made me feel comfortable around her.
I didn’t expect this to happen, but somehow she took me back.
Olia forgave me and she gave me a chance that I didn’t deserve.
Even...
I thought love had ended for her and me, but good fortune was on my side.
After about two years had passed, she tried to rekindle our love.
I couldn’t believe it when Olia called me and said she wanted to see me.
When I went to Olia’s apartment, she could sense my uneasiness.
She spoke to me kindly and she made me feel comfortable around her.
I didn’t expect this to happen, but somehow she took me back.
Olia forgave me and she gave me a chance that I didn’t deserve.
Even...
#love
#relationships
#breakup
#shame
#luck
84 reads
3 Comments
Sandals
Poem Published
24th Oct 2022 6:10pm
24th Oct 2022 6:10pm
A Lost Love Heartbreak Relationship
A Lost Love Heartbreak
Relationship chance gone to
Women and it's fair
Needed not warning
Me talking to them wasn't
Fair so they did not
Stick at all around
To listen to anything
Of a warning to
Them about the girl
Who planned on breaking their hearts
So I bailed like them
Because I'm not a
Heartbreak anniversary
That's the girl of warned
Relationship chance gone to
Women and it's fair
Needed not warning
Me talking to them wasn't
Fair so they did not
Stick at all around
To listen to anything
Of a warning to
Them about the girl
Who planned on breaking their hearts
So I bailed like them
Because I'm not a
Heartbreak anniversary
That's the girl of warned
#girlfriend
#women
#relationships
#breakup
#hurt
84 reads
0 Comments
skymikan
Poem Published
22nd Oct 2022 7:51am
22nd Oct 2022 7:51am
october.
i really wish you remember
baby now it’s october
september’s gone but still raining
but now it’s all over
i just wake up from
the rainy nights you’ve spent
i knocked on your door
three times but you’re not answering
i stand to see the autumn falling
back before it was hard to see
it’s past eight in the evening
but you’re not willing to be with me
i really wish you remember
“i will come back in october”
i can pick up your calls now
baby tell me it is not over
i really wish you remember ...
baby now it’s october
september’s gone but still raining
but now it’s all over
i just wake up from
the rainy nights you’ve spent
i knocked on your door
three times but you’re not answering
i stand to see the autumn falling
back before it was hard to see
it’s past eight in the evening
but you’re not willing to be with me
i really wish you remember
“i will come back in october”
i can pick up your calls now
baby tell me it is not over
i really wish you remember ...
#breakup
#MentalHealth
#IMissYou
47 reads
1 Comment
DU Poetry : Breakup Seeking Honest Critique Poems
