Breakup Seeking Honest Critique Poems
#breakup
breakup seeking honest critique poems. Honest feedback has been requested for these poems.
Again
The sadness rushes over me like being caught in the undertow
As I look in the eyes of someone i barely know
My best friend, my partner, my other half, my soul is gone
I am stuck in a chamber of torture as I watch her move on
I scream internally as my heart dies a slow death
Unwilling to accept that our love has taken its last breath
All the moments I should have cherished play out in my mind
As she turns her back and leaves me behind
This coldness I feel from her is impossible to comprehend
I tore down my walls for a...
As I look in the eyes of someone i barely know
My best friend, my partner, my other half, my soul is gone
I am stuck in a chamber of torture as I watch her move on
I scream internally as my heart dies a slow death
Unwilling to accept that our love has taken its last breath
All the moments I should have cherished play out in my mind
As she turns her back and leaves me behind
This coldness I feel from her is impossible to comprehend
I tore down my walls for a...
#breakup
#heartbroken
#loneliness #sadness
#loneliness #sadness
33 reads
0 Comments
Once We Were
Occasional tears
never do dry
because it mattered
the reason I cry
A bit of me broken
yet living on
despite the pain
from a time now gone
Memories recalled
reminded of your scent
fond recollection
moments we spent
Once lovers, now friends
both of us changed
the future we had
has been rearranged
From love that was
I shall not hide
for you always
a place aside
never do dry
because it mattered
the reason I cry
A bit of me broken
yet living on
despite the pain
from a time now gone
Memories recalled
reminded of your scent
fond recollection
moments we spent
Once lovers, now friends
both of us changed
the future we had
has been rearranged
From love that was
I shall not hide
for you always
a place aside
#love
#breakup
#NaPoWriMo2024
34 reads
0 Comments
In Disbelief
You must live in straight denial. As you stand there with a smile. You don't care about me, that's clear to see. So why do you refuse to let me be. I will never be what you want or need. No matter how much I bend or weave. I cannot believe what you have put me through. The whole time, knowing the pain you would ensue. You planned all this from day one. There was not a dammed thing I could have done. I am so tired of being under your control. I think hurting me is your only real goal. Go find someone or something else to take up your time. I no longer wish to call you mine!
#heartbroken
#breakup
#emotional #hurt
#emotional #hurt
24 reads
1 Comment
Angry As SHIT!
#relationships
#breakup
#conflict
11 reads
1 Comment
Safety Bubble
Within this safe bubble
I remain
Nursing my
Wounded heart
After you walked
Away from me
I remain
Nursing my
Wounded heart
After you walked
Away from me
#heartbroken
#breakup
#suffering
50 reads
16 Comments
I Long For The Sparrows Song
I can be found upon
a rock of sorrow,
holding to a last
kiss which even in
the careless wind lingers
on lips, still warm from your breath.
In the distance I can
hear the sparrows song;
a mourning lullaby,
as if she laments for my
broken porcelain heart,
how she can see I'm in tatters,
frayed at the edges and staked to the
ground with heavy limbs of lead,
waiting for you....
yearning to be lost in those eyes
Just
One
More
Time
I Know it's futile,
I know it will never be, ...
a rock of sorrow,
holding to a last
kiss which even in
the careless wind lingers
on lips, still warm from your breath.
In the distance I can
hear the sparrows song;
a mourning lullaby,
as if she laments for my
broken porcelain heart,
how she can see I'm in tatters,
frayed at the edges and staked to the
ground with heavy limbs of lead,
waiting for you....
yearning to be lost in those eyes
Just
One
More
Time
I Know it's futile,
I know it will never be, ...
#love
#depression
#breakup
58 reads
4 Comments
Remembering My Deepest Heartbreak
Always remembering
to hold close
the lesson learned.
Reflecting
on how intensely
I was burned
and understood
to focus
on healing.
I spent time
recovering
and tending
to skin peeling.
I kept the wounds
clean
Inevitably
scars formed
Tears streamed
down my face
as I quietly
reformed.
Patiently
I wait
for him and karma
to meet.
Something
he won't be able
to cheat.
to hold close
the lesson learned.
Reflecting
on how intensely
I was burned
and understood
to focus
on healing.
I spent time
recovering
and tending
to skin peeling.
I kept the wounds
clean
Inevitably
scars formed
Tears streamed
down my face
as I quietly
reformed.
Patiently
I wait
for him and karma
to meet.
Something
he won't be able
to cheat.
#breakup
#betrayal
52 reads
6 Comments
Lies and Deception
Looking into those eyes,
so strong so true.
Never could I have imagined,
Behind those two.
Your words created a veil, a mask,
It matched the answers that I had to ask.
I wanted love, honor, and trust.
What I got was lies, cruelty, and lust.
The eyes are the picture of the soul,
But what I got was something I could not hold.
Finally, the lies slip, and the truth is revealed.
Tumbling out as if it was behind a seal.
There is only so long you can hide.
The truth that is pent up deep inside.
Here is what happens when it ends. ...
so strong so true.
Never could I have imagined,
Behind those two.
Your words created a veil, a mask,
It matched the answers that I had to ask.
I wanted love, honor, and trust.
What I got was lies, cruelty, and lust.
The eyes are the picture of the soul,
But what I got was something I could not hold.
Finally, the lies slip, and the truth is revealed.
Tumbling out as if it was behind a seal.
There is only so long you can hide.
The truth that is pent up deep inside.
Here is what happens when it ends. ...
#breakup
#lover
#FeelingLost
77 reads
6 Comments
#25
At a glance,
Took no chance,
Peering in,
Struggling,
It ended with:
Red eyes,
Red flags,
Red lines.
You said that you were clean,
You said that you had changed, But when the daylight came,
I found you just the same.
Now I'm at a loss for words,
Now look at where we are at.
These days you think you feel the worst, The straw that breaks your back.
You can work yourself to the bone.
True but don't hurt your own home
Lose like life might not condone.
Look at the proof all around you!
How much will it take...
Took no chance,
Peering in,
Struggling,
It ended with:
Red eyes,
Red flags,
Red lines.
You said that you were clean,
You said that you had changed, But when the daylight came,
I found you just the same.
Now I'm at a loss for words,
Now look at where we are at.
These days you think you feel the worst, The straw that breaks your back.
You can work yourself to the bone.
True but don't hurt your own home
Lose like life might not condone.
Look at the proof all around you!
How much will it take...
#breakup
#betrayal
#death #confusion
#death #confusion
42 reads
0 Comments
Chasing A Ghost
This pressing need of mine
Holding on to yesterday
Why does it feel
So much like now?
You dog my dreams
It seems so real
Time is ticking
My mind is tricking me
Into believing I am
As young again as
I was then when
times were sweet
And we had
A hot thing going on
When I'm in my right mind
I know you weren't
The best man for me
And I wish I could
Stop this madness
Forget about you 'cause
This feels a whole lot
Like I'm chasing a ghost
Holding on to yesterday
Why does it feel
So much like now?
You dog my dreams
It seems so real
Time is ticking
My mind is tricking me
Into believing I am
As young again as
I was then when
times were sweet
And we had
A hot thing going on
When I'm in my right mind
I know you weren't
The best man for me
And I wish I could
Stop this madness
Forget about you 'cause
This feels a whole lot
Like I'm chasing a ghost
#breakup
#conflict
#ILoveYou #passion
#ILoveYou #passion
106 reads
11 Comments
Oh I Hate The Rain
Have you ever stood in the rain
Hoping it would hide the tears that fell
It never does
The sun rose and decided to lightly trace the body that lay beside me.
chasing away the chill from the night
This was it
Our last night
And do I regret it?
No
Eyes flutter open and looking into mine
It says more than words could ever say
Goodbye.
I smile, rose from the bed that we will never share it again.
Put my clothes on and left the key.
It was four years to the day
when I seen him again.
He looked at...
Hoping it would hide the tears that fell
It never does
The sun rose and decided to lightly trace the body that lay beside me.
chasing away the chill from the night
This was it
Our last night
And do I regret it?
No
Eyes flutter open and looking into mine
It says more than words could ever say
Goodbye.
I smile, rose from the bed that we will never share it again.
Put my clothes on and left the key.
It was four years to the day
when I seen him again.
He looked at...
#love
#breakup
106 reads
8 Comments
Strangers
We met on the Metro. You recognized me first then noticed my tummy and smiled. “When is your baby due?”
“In about six weeks,” I said.
“That’s very exciting,” you said, and I wondered who you were now. I remembered how you felt and the enthusiasm of our bodies acting as if on autopilot. I remembered those nights of seeking what would always be unattainable.
I knew a day would come in the future when we wouldn't even recognize one another upon meeting. Just two passing strangers preoccupied with survival and desire.
I never mastered the art of...
“In about six weeks,” I said.
“That’s very exciting,” you said, and I wondered who you were now. I remembered how you felt and the enthusiasm of our bodies acting as if on autopilot. I remembered those nights of seeking what would always be unattainable.
I knew a day would come in the future when we wouldn't even recognize one another upon meeting. Just two passing strangers preoccupied with survival and desire.
I never mastered the art of...
#breakup
#sex
#memories
123 reads
3 Comments
DU Poetry : Breakup Seeking Honest Critique Poems