ANTI BIKINI RANT

(Another verse inspired by John Feddeler’s poem “absolute women”.  Imagined outburst of a Puritan Mr Angry over the then recently invented Bikini swimming costume, but is tripped up in his passion on his own slip of words.  

The Vatican did pronounce against it and it was initially banned in Spain and Italy.)

Mister Puritan, breathing fire,
Fumed: “What’s this object of desire?
Louis Reard and Jacques Heim,
What inspired this visual crime?
Trying to raise the population
By spurring men to copulation?
Getting maidens to bare so much
Will bring on them defiling touch.
Our misled males won’t help but stare
At what’s glorified underwear."

"What thoughts will enter minds of men
Who see it worn by the ‘fair hen’?
What will it do to married lives
If it’s taken up by our wives?
I see adultery increase
If wearing of it does not cease!"
“YOU’D BEST REPHRASE THIS LINE OF VERSE!”
Heckler called. “It might make things worse,”
Explaining to the pompous prude:
“You’ve just suggested they bathe nude!”