Am I Dead Yet?

Everything I read  
Everything I see  
Screams at me  
It's telling me  
Just end it all, throw in the towel.  
I should have perished long ago.  
 
Friends come and go,  
Family I take or leave,  
Dead poets call to me,  
Misery loves company.  
 
Those who made the choice  
seem fearless to me.  
They say  
"There's no pain"  
"I did my time"  
"I made my mark"  
Life was a prison and they got out with "proscribed" behavior.  
 
Then there's the media  
Television, movies, radio, newspapers, billboards, books, and magazines can't help but passively imply  
The state of nothing and everything  
Don't you know the world's coming to an end?  
I check the calendar every day  
In disbelief at what day it is.  
 
Didn't I decide to end it all last night?  
 
How am I so sure that I'm alive?  
 
Everything I read  
Everything I see  
Everything screams at me  
Everything is telling me  
 
I should have perished long ago.




Tanzen Lilly 2013