thanks (for Indie's "fail" comp)

I must first thank        
the fear of success        
   
and the interaction        
between narcissism        
and low self esteem        
that has brought me to this bedroom.        
       
The bedroom of my childhood,        
the one I left fifteen years ago        
with the wind to my back        
and the stars aligned to my shadow        
       
but then decided to turn around and piss,        
to take the kismet of the constellations        
for granted        
and to laugh at the vacuums behind them.        
       
I would like to thank        
childhood naivety        
for pulling every fire alarm,        
and misjudging the extents of lunacy.        
       
Lastly, any shred of decency        
forbids me from thanking her      
       
oh no, that steaming pile of praise        
is for me alone        
       
because it is me        
who is blessed with sleepless nights        
compulsions towards any escape        
and the coup-de-fucking-grace,        
       
my mania.        
       
A single tingle given,        
can make a sewage worker        
feel like an artist.        
       
That is my true love        
the thanks for which, can not be transcribed