deepundergroundpoetry.com
Old Man Winter
Old man winter
came to call
seems so bitter
worse than fall
howling winds
drifting snow
bites right through you
leaves you raw
only those who understand
what it's like in a frozen land
appreciate the springtime thaw
warm and cozy like a shawl
I can hardly wait till then
the warming days
the balmy wind
they give way
to rainy days
when flowers grow
and children play
summer comes and goes so fast
warm days slip into the past
from long days
nights grow cold
fall arrives almost untold
just in time to chill the bones
Old man winter rises soon
how the changes come too soon
came to call
seems so bitter
worse than fall
howling winds
drifting snow
bites right through you
leaves you raw
only those who understand
what it's like in a frozen land
appreciate the springtime thaw
warm and cozy like a shawl
I can hardly wait till then
the warming days
the balmy wind
they give way
to rainy days
when flowers grow
and children play
summer comes and goes so fast
warm days slip into the past
from long days
nights grow cold
fall arrives almost untold
just in time to chill the bones
Old man winter rises soon
how the changes come too soon
Published 29th Jan 2013
All writing remains the property of the author. Don't use it for any purpose without their permission.
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comments 10
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The author encourages honest critique.
29th Jan 2013 10:32pm
29th Jan 2013 11:26pm
Anonymous
- Edited 29th Jan 2013 10:54pm
29th Jan 2013 10:53pm
Hey, man.
Why is it we always assume the worst of winter?
Sure, it bites you raw and eats you cold....but guess what?
Proves you're alive!
You can feel, hey.
Do so love this poem, though, especially the last two lines.
I think you did a Shakespearean on us there.
It ends on a kind of positive note, almost with regret that winter has to end......
Just a tiny pity your rhyming couplet .....over-rhymes a tad....same word? Could be a bit better, that.
What do you think, S?
Pen on, poet!
Tidespotter
Why is it we always assume the worst of winter?
Sure, it bites you raw and eats you cold....but guess what?
Proves you're alive!
You can feel, hey.
Do so love this poem, though, especially the last two lines.
I think you did a Shakespearean on us there.
It ends on a kind of positive note, almost with regret that winter has to end......
Just a tiny pity your rhyming couplet .....over-rhymes a tad....same word? Could be a bit better, that.
What do you think, S?
Pen on, poet!
Tidespotter
29th Jan 2013 11:24pm
Hey T, yes you are right about the couplet. I wrote this today as I was working we had a 22 below zero air temp with a 30 km wind which made it approximately 35 below zero...frikkin cold brother.. I don't mind winter , after all I am Canadian. And I work outside.. S.
Anonymous
- Edited 30th Jan 2013 7:07am
30th Jan 2013 7:02am
22below?!
No way, man!
Plus wind? No, I can't stand coldness AND wind.
I gots to be mighty crazy to be out there, as much as I love, love, love winter.
Better in the south, any day....breeze, sea, mountain, balmy sun....you dig?
Bet your blue's turning to green now, hey....just teasing now, ok :-)
Can't believe it. Brrrr....!
Man, do you feel your toes at all, let alone....never mind :-)
Nah, I say ...leave the couplet.....they need to remain together...to keep each other warm!
Keep 'em toes all toasty now.
Warm greetings from the south
Tidespotter
No way, man!
Plus wind? No, I can't stand coldness AND wind.
I gots to be mighty crazy to be out there, as much as I love, love, love winter.
Better in the south, any day....breeze, sea, mountain, balmy sun....you dig?
Bet your blue's turning to green now, hey....just teasing now, ok :-)
Can't believe it. Brrrr....!
Man, do you feel your toes at all, let alone....never mind :-)
Nah, I say ...leave the couplet.....they need to remain together...to keep each other warm!
Keep 'em toes all toasty now.
Warm greetings from the south
Tidespotter
Anonymous
30th Jan 2013 00:27am
Loved reading this wonderfully written poem! Thank you so much for sharing! :)
Carlene
Carlene
30th Jan 2013 00:57am
I am glad that you liked it enough to comment, Thank you very much, I am kind of new to this, but am having a lot of fun.. I guess I mean by new to this.. writing poetry,per say, ha ha, Cheers!!! And thanks again! S.
Anonymous
30th Jan 2013 2:47am
The poem's great, Scot & you're welcome. I'm fairly new to this, too - although late to the plate, so to speak. I look at it as a lifelong apprenticeship. It's all in the practise, I find. Much good luck with your own writing!!
Cheers-Carlene
Cheers-Carlene
30th Jan 2013 3:15am
Thanks Carlene, I too am late to the plate as you say,(which is a great saying by the way) ,However I am enjoying this immensely, it is very theraputic as well, It is great to meet and read other writers and compare notes so to speak.
cheers Scot.
cheers Scot.
Anonymous
30th Jan 2013 3:41am
Scot, I couldn't agree more with the 'enjoyment' & 'therapeutic' value etc! DU's a great site. Enjoy! :)
Best-Carlene
Best-Carlene
