10thousand feet under the sea (you never knew me at all)

I’m ten thousand feet underwater
hanging upside down
chained to the anchor of your words
chained to the anchor of my indiscretions

You never knew me at all

My conscience lies somewhere
dismembered
at the bottom of the ocean
surrounded by fragile skeleton fish
and smoking underwater volcanoes
as skinny and ashen and weighed down
as the reasons I’ve allowed this drowning

I’m all bones among decayed flesh
and yesterday’s thoughts
I’m a fearless coward
running for all the wrong reasons

No, you don’t know me at all

So, let the sunlight ripple its way into the darkness
like heaven in a chaotic sky
and I’ll pray upon the carcasses of fish
falling like angels through the saline depths
to cover me in ghosted death
my hollow words forgotten
as they float upon the currents
a cracked, water logged message in a bottle
to reach your deaf eyes and blind ears       

I’m just a ghost with seaweed mummified dreams
ten thousand feet under the sea
chained to the anchor of meaningless words
and you can’t save what’s already dead
no, you can’t save what doesn’t want to be saved

I’m no ships’ mermaid figure head in distress
I don’t need your chains and compass to show me where to go
when I am the mistress of my own drowned destiny

So, save your pretty words
save your hollow promises that it’s better on the other side

You never knew me at all

© Indie Adams 2013