Fingerchain

'Thewy' that's a great word; I've never heard that before. It's like strips of willow. It's one of those words whose sounds seems to tell it, more than anything else.
It's interesting - I was imagining the line 'I think my voice is too familiar' without the 'I think' in front of it, and without it the tone of the voice seems to change entirely. With it the voice seems much more human; not a sharply constructed piece of poem, but a genuine human expression, which is always better. And I think the build up to 'you are immutable' with the dark dense imagery, all the you's dotted into it and sunk in, works really well.
That's just the kind of image I find fascinating, that 'covered in hands' bit. That's why messing around with tracing paper is so fun; layers - I've been thinking on that word for two years now. And I love how you've got 'bare', 'intimate', and 'nakendess' all together, but differentiated. It seems to emphasise that idea of layering talked about at the start of that verse. I was listening to someone talk the other day about the difference between the words 'nude' and 'naked', and your bit there reminded me of that.
I kind of wanted something after the 'cooling each burn'. I wanted it to go on. Though, thinking about it, that the start talks about an end, but that the actual end of the poem seems when I read it to halt, instead of coming to a conclusion, is interesting actually. Though I may be looking into it all too much.

Yeah though the poem is highly decorated with such words like thewy I wanted it to still breathe that personal air.

I think the conclusion is that it can't be concluded; you see it's going back and forth throughout and some things are never too sure. As it is usually with these topics when they are ongoing. You're definitely right about the last line though; it's not enough.

I feel there's something missing somewhere in between and off the end. I'll have to think.

Thanks for your in-depth review, Merda.

Dense
(in thee best 'sense')

an other remarkable rite...
thusly
remarked

Why thank ya kindly, saxman.

Lovely poem, Mr. A.

Fave lines are:

*Every word that was shielded by your malleable, thewy figures
(Love the verb, but what's "thewy"?)

*Over time it's become clear
that everything tastes better before its prime
(Whoa! Superb line and kinda sad sentiment. Glad though, to see correct usage of.....its and it's...there's even a third one, hey)

*and I spent years peeling back fingers
(Wondered why you used this verb here...?)

*It's the thunder that has been heard so often
that it's now become the calm; silent
(Methinks, the second "it's" feels a tad awkward here...maybe better placement after "now".....? Just a thought, of course)

Overall, an enjoyable read.
Thanks for sharing, Mr. A.

Cheers
Tidespotter

Wow, mighty tidespotter. Cheers for...leaving something.

"You came to me, covered in hands
and I spent years peeling back fingers"
Need, ownership, pity, pressed tight together
Too good; phrase stayed with me most of the day

Good phrasing. Cheers, Kaatho.

I think it was Jack who commented once that you have the closest thing to "publishable" poetry on here, or something close to that affect. I concur with him Mr. A. You are sitting on the edge of the cliff my friend, and I do look forward to the day when you leap. :)

Excellent stuff !

There's millions of publishables, Maggie, but that's a horrible world to walk into. The world wants less I think. Very kind of you to say so, and thank you for saying it.

So I take it they haven't changed much in 20 years ?

*smiles*