Talking To Myself.....Again

My head hurts
pounding thoughts
beating the shit out of my brain

why?
I hate that question
I hate asking myself that question

my broken heart throbs
trying to save itself
from the inevitable

I have assaulted my own soul
with stupid thoughts
wasted dreams and fucked up ideals

reality hit me
it kinda hurt too
now I'm freaking out over the why's

fuck why
why do I care?
no one else does or did

my inner awesomeness says " fuck it move on"
I pretend I have
but in all actuality I have not

yep.....
I miss the person who stole everything I ever owned
why? there it is again that fucking why!

I pace around trying to figure myself out
the only thing I discover is that I really need to dust
and perhaps run a vacuum through this place

no inner truths revealed
except, everything will crumble into nothing eventually
my house is a disaster area and my tea is cold

I have to leave the universe alone
I need to stop bombarding it with moronic bullshit
I need some inner stillness in my life

can't cling to my ego forever
I need to learn how to let go
and to stop fretting over the whys