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Crusading in Darkness
- Crusading in Darkness -
Tearing at the walls of all reason, hate unyielding,
My spirit: raging like the flames of pandemonium…
Gives vent to all the forces that I had been shielding.
Yet, I remain myself, and none can truly condemn…
The tireless purpose to which my heart is ever given!
In love I was ever passionate, ever given to glories…
The banner I held was white and pure as fallen snow.
Like Joan of Arc, I crusaded for my myriad beliefs…
And for them I burned, consuming all that I did know.
I burned for being me and for having mightily striven!
Yet my memory persists, the pain and the pleasure…
Until I rose up again, whole and pristine as the stars!
Yet my heart was darkened, beyond former measure.
A goddess reborn, yet never healed of all her scars…
Look upon me; am I not familiar to the ancient mind?
In my very hands, I held the chalice of holy legend,
Having laid aside, the spear which rules not destiny.
And I learned from her of truth unknowable to men!
In Avalon: in a dark other world of sublime secrecy.
Where roses bloom reddest, where magic shall bind!
Faerie to some, demon to others, I was the catalyst…
Through which ascended a noble aspect, of majesty.
But I remained myself, though I had glimpsed bliss,
To rival that of Heaven and Elysium both, ere long!
I became the prize I sought, the chalice of greatness.
And God for me took on a form of feminine design,
For I chose this for myself, and so She obliged me…
Granting unto my soul a portion of all that is divine.
Over all other children of flesh, I alone did thus see,
The things set aside for man, which curse and bless!
The hidden nature of creative will, made manifest…
Both within, and without, where ancient kings wait.
In Avalon: where I passed the seventh and final test,
Prepared by they who watch in silence, darkly great.
I crusaded in darkness, and yet is the light the whole?
People mock me and they understand not my nature.
For how man a mortal man fathom my higher ways!
When humanity evolves, becomes far more mature…
They will see as I do, and know more peaceful days!
Every hand, has a place as every heart plays its’ role.
I let go of my hatred for a season, of my fear as well,
Giving myself to divinity, as a harlot to her beloved…
Wanton and willing to pass through even a fiery hell!
Reborn through the darkness: living beyond the dead.
Until at least, my brow is given the crown of reward!
I am a queen, though wandering seeking a kingdom…
Knightly virtues having begun my quest: long before.
Yet I have grown beyond them, embracing wisdom…
Remaining myself, even as I became something more.
My quest is eternal; and, tireless is my sacred sword!
Beyond emerald isles and towers of glass I did soar…
As I lived in lifetimes past, until I became this being,
Which, I am now having crossed the far distant door.
Once I was an angel, though now I have not a wing…
Save of light alone, in substance no eye can perceive.
I wish not to walk alone, so come with me and learn,
The things only I can teach, only I can grant in peace.
Many are the secrets for which I once did hotly burn!
There are such sights to be shown, and beyond these,
My love shall consume all, leaving none left to grieve.
Tearing at the walls of all reason, hate unyielding,
My spirit: raging like the flames of pandemonium…
Gives vent to all the forces that I had been shielding.
Yet, I remain myself, and none can truly condemn…
The tireless purpose to which my heart is ever given!
In love I was ever passionate, ever given to glories…
The banner I held was white and pure as fallen snow.
Like Joan of Arc, I crusaded for my myriad beliefs…
And for them I burned, consuming all that I did know.
I burned for being me and for having mightily striven!
Yet my memory persists, the pain and the pleasure…
Until I rose up again, whole and pristine as the stars!
Yet my heart was darkened, beyond former measure.
A goddess reborn, yet never healed of all her scars…
Look upon me; am I not familiar to the ancient mind?
In my very hands, I held the chalice of holy legend,
Having laid aside, the spear which rules not destiny.
And I learned from her of truth unknowable to men!
In Avalon: in a dark other world of sublime secrecy.
Where roses bloom reddest, where magic shall bind!
Faerie to some, demon to others, I was the catalyst…
Through which ascended a noble aspect, of majesty.
But I remained myself, though I had glimpsed bliss,
To rival that of Heaven and Elysium both, ere long!
I became the prize I sought, the chalice of greatness.
And God for me took on a form of feminine design,
For I chose this for myself, and so She obliged me…
Granting unto my soul a portion of all that is divine.
Over all other children of flesh, I alone did thus see,
The things set aside for man, which curse and bless!
The hidden nature of creative will, made manifest…
Both within, and without, where ancient kings wait.
In Avalon: where I passed the seventh and final test,
Prepared by they who watch in silence, darkly great.
I crusaded in darkness, and yet is the light the whole?
People mock me and they understand not my nature.
For how man a mortal man fathom my higher ways!
When humanity evolves, becomes far more mature…
They will see as I do, and know more peaceful days!
Every hand, has a place as every heart plays its’ role.
I let go of my hatred for a season, of my fear as well,
Giving myself to divinity, as a harlot to her beloved…
Wanton and willing to pass through even a fiery hell!
Reborn through the darkness: living beyond the dead.
Until at least, my brow is given the crown of reward!
I am a queen, though wandering seeking a kingdom…
Knightly virtues having begun my quest: long before.
Yet I have grown beyond them, embracing wisdom…
Remaining myself, even as I became something more.
My quest is eternal; and, tireless is my sacred sword!
Beyond emerald isles and towers of glass I did soar…
As I lived in lifetimes past, until I became this being,
Which, I am now having crossed the far distant door.
Once I was an angel, though now I have not a wing…
Save of light alone, in substance no eye can perceive.
I wish not to walk alone, so come with me and learn,
The things only I can teach, only I can grant in peace.
Many are the secrets for which I once did hotly burn!
There are such sights to be shown, and beyond these,
My love shall consume all, leaving none left to grieve.
Published 5th Dec 2012
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Anonymous
5th Dec 2012 8:22am
Wonderful and simply beautiful!
Such a delight to see your fabulous writings again my dear friend!
Avalon, sweet avalon, awaits in the mists of time.
Its like returning to a place one comes from.
To me, Avalon is part of my homegrounds!
Thanks for the powerful write dear Jessica!
Such a delight to see your fabulous writings again my dear friend!
Avalon, sweet avalon, awaits in the mists of time.
Its like returning to a place one comes from.
To me, Avalon is part of my homegrounds!
Thanks for the powerful write dear Jessica!
6th Dec 2012 7:04am
It was a pleasure to share this with you, and of course with the rest of the community here as well! I was feeling quite inspired when I penned this one, and it was like when a great magic wells up within you and must be cast forth. Poetry is a magic all its' own, and naught is more magical to write of than fair Avalon! :)
