deepundergroundpoetry.com

I don't feel the need to do this

It's not very often
that I notice the linear array of empty cans
along the tops of the walls
and those on the spiked fence
like sacrificial heads.

I walk past the home
for the homeless
and see them all eating their dinner
in groups of four or maybe five.
It looks so civilised
until the car drives past
its stereo loud
its music bad
its driver, no doubt one stereotype or the other

A group of four students
break my thoughts
from an unexpected pleasantry
and snap me straight back
to the ease at which I find sadness
in all of this.
They are loud,
and they shout at lone passers by.
They don't shout at me.

Two girls with good legs on show
walk in front of me
up until the point where I cross the road,
I watch them and feel nothing...
I'm distracted by forthcoming first aid exams,
the sudden dip in my confidence
and the impending sense of being in the wrong place
for too long.

As I pass them on the opposite side of the road
I have no desire to turn around
and see their faces.
I already know exactly what they'll look like.
They'll look like everyone...

uninteresting.

Now I'm at home, realising
that the only thing that brings me to the page
is righteousness and woe.
Two ugly things
whilst cars pass by
and the oven heats up to 190 degrees.

I'm having gammon and hard boiled eggs
with a pint of milk
if you care to know.
I don't care
I want to be where I was three hours ago
those situation where you can't think like this
and run at the page
as if its going to save you.

I don't enjoy doing this.
The more I think about it,
I never did.
I tricked myself with romanticism
and cigarette smoke.
There is nothing hard about poetry,
not like splintered shins
and broken knuckles.
Poetry is for those dying inside
and I can smell it on all of you.
I fucking stink of it,
and if any of them notice it
I'm a dead man.






Written by CruelHandedWriter (Jamie Rhodes)
Published
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