deepundergroundpoetry.com
man made
I've been waiting my whole life to blow something up,
set the timer on the detonator and just wait it out.
There's a gun in my head, but I've never quite been able
to pull the trigger and cerebrally bleed my way into oblivion
where some part of me believes there is a world of mindless peace;
how heaven must seem to those religious sheep impaling themselves
on white picket fences, just so they never have to ask themselves
why the world doesn't make sense.
I'm a man-made miracle born with the gift of self-destruction
like holy ascension was ever an option when I've spent most of my days
in the anti-social contemplation of death
my entire being moulded from fire and brimstone, the wires in my head
assigned the secret task of killing me slowly via the disease of dis-ease.
Would you miss me if I was gone? I missed me when I was gone.
And now we're back here, there are tears in my eyes again,
for all the wrong reasons - for all the right reasons - for no reason at all.
I've been waiting my whole life to blow something up
There's a gun in my head
And today
I didn't think about dying
© Indie Adams 2012
set the timer on the detonator and just wait it out.
There's a gun in my head, but I've never quite been able
to pull the trigger and cerebrally bleed my way into oblivion
where some part of me believes there is a world of mindless peace;
how heaven must seem to those religious sheep impaling themselves
on white picket fences, just so they never have to ask themselves
why the world doesn't make sense.
I'm a man-made miracle born with the gift of self-destruction
like holy ascension was ever an option when I've spent most of my days
in the anti-social contemplation of death
my entire being moulded from fire and brimstone, the wires in my head
assigned the secret task of killing me slowly via the disease of dis-ease.
Would you miss me if I was gone? I missed me when I was gone.
And now we're back here, there are tears in my eyes again,
for all the wrong reasons - for all the right reasons - for no reason at all.
I've been waiting my whole life to blow something up
There's a gun in my head
And today
I didn't think about dying
© Indie Adams 2012
Written by
Indie
(Miss Indie)
Published 9th Aug 2012
| Edited 1st Nov 2018
All writing remains the property of the author. Don't use it for any purpose without their permission.
likes 12
reading list entries 1
comments 20
reads 1116
Commenting Preference:
The author encourages honest critique.
Re: man made
9th Aug 2012 3:44pm
Brimstone baby disco inferno I can dig it... For me that "dis-ease" is intellect un- applied, and I know it well. Think the opening lines and closing lines quite poignant. And I am a sucker for all out destruction, specifically in metaphor or art, as physical destruction is childs play. Thanks for the read indie
2
re: Re: man made
11th Aug 2012 00:12am
Thank you for the comment :D I like coinage of "dis-ease" being intellect un-applied. I hadn't really thought about it like that, but it makes complete sense to me. The only self-destruction I do these days is via metaphors, which is actually more fun than the way I used to do it.
Thanks again, peace, Indie
Thanks again, peace, Indie
Re: man made
9th Aug 2012 9:49pm
Indie you never fail to write wonderful pieces. This is no exception.
1
re: Re: man made
11th Aug 2012 00:13am
Re: man made
11th Aug 2012 8:42am
re: Re: man made
11th Aug 2012 8:46am
Re: man made
11th Aug 2012 1:09pm
re: Re: man made
11th Aug 2012 1:12pm
Re: man made
Anonymous
12th Aug 2012 00:55am
'Theres a gun in my head, but I've never quite been able
to pull the trigger and cerebrally bleed my way into oblivion'
"yes!!!" x 1000
a relatable feeling with varying degrees and very eloquently put. manic enough to make it believable, but controlled, too, with a slow pace that reminded me of the walk that would be from the prison cell to the execution. it's so awesome to watch someone maintain their voice throughout a sequence of poems, but improve from one to the next. i enjoyed this so much. :]
to pull the trigger and cerebrally bleed my way into oblivion'
"yes!!!" x 1000
a relatable feeling with varying degrees and very eloquently put. manic enough to make it believable, but controlled, too, with a slow pace that reminded me of the walk that would be from the prison cell to the execution. it's so awesome to watch someone maintain their voice throughout a sequence of poems, but improve from one to the next. i enjoyed this so much. :]
2
re: Re: man made
13th Aug 2012 9:58am
thank you very much aglitch, for your incredibly lovely comment. :D Very much appreciated. I'm kinda speechless at such high praise.
Peace, Indie
Peace, Indie
Re: man made
i absolutely love this... sneakily saw it elsewhere a couple of days ago and wow. it felt like a breath of air. i love the line length, the conversational feel that doesn't want to stop
"I missed me when I was gone.
And now were back here, there are tears in my eyes again,
for all the wrong reasons - for all the right reasons - for no reason at all." - i know that feeling precisely.. awesome job, Indie.
"I missed me when I was gone.
And now were back here, there are tears in my eyes again,
for all the wrong reasons - for all the right reasons - for no reason at all." - i know that feeling precisely.. awesome job, Indie.
1
re: Re: man made
17th Aug 2012 10:26pm
Honoured that you stopped by Jesta :D thank you for your feedback. Love the comment "love the line length, the conversational feel that doesn't want to stop". Glad you enjoyed this one. Thanks again.
Peace, Indie
Peace, Indie
Re: man made
26th Aug 2012 10:42am
re: Re: man made
26th Aug 2012 11:09am
Re: man made
26th Aug 2012 3:17pm
It is amazing how sacrilegious religion is. Thank you for a look inside.
0
re: Re: man made
27th Aug 2012 9:03am
Re: man made
26th Aug 2012 3:56pm
Well said. I even liked the entire white picket fence part .. Nice one my secret crush lol
0
re: Re: man made
27th Aug 2012 9:05am
Re: man made
26th Aug 2012 9:13pm
Indie I love this poem it implies power at having the gun to your head while not falling for the hell and brimstone bit..I can completely relate to this powerfully written poem..peace Crim
0
re: Re: man made
27th Aug 2012 9:07am
Thank you lovely lady, for your insight. I'm glad you enjoyed the poem. Good to see you popping back in every now and again. xx
Peace, Indie
Peace, Indie