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Sexual Encounters

I answered an emergency call of a wild dog.  The woman was terrified and cornered.   I ran straight at the rabid German Shepard. He tore at my hand, running off with my leather motorcycle glove.  The woman was overwhelmed at my random act of kindness, and asked if there were anything she could do. I asked her if she could make glove, as I was missing one.

She reached out to take my hand, and brought me inside, then took off her dress.

I went to a wedding  for my ex girlfreind Kate, who was marrying my best friend Nick.  I wrapped up their wedding gift, and taped a handwritten card, that said, "ForNickKate".  I handed it to a lady next to the gift table, who stared at my card for a while, then took me by the hand and led me into a room where she took off her dress,

It began to occur to me that I was one of those men that women, on sight, could not resist.  I was ready.

I was sent to a house that was robbed, but I could not find the street until two hours had passed.  When  I finally got there, the lady said, Cop You Late!  I took off my pants and held out my hand.  She ran back inside and locked the door.  I left, scratching my head.

I was fired from my job as a public defender, and became a grocery store manager.  The plastic bag shipment was late, and a Mexican lady barged in to my office.  I said, What do you Want?  She said, "I wan to have sacks!"  I took off my pants, and held out my hand.  She screamed, and ran outside.  I thought to myself that my luck with women was taking a turn for the worse.

I quietly slipped out of the store, and never looked back.

Oh, well, there are more fish in the sea.






Written by rabbitquest
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