deepundergroundpoetry.com

Never Question (Blind Faith)

Astrid: There's nothing wrong with being a Christian.
Ingrid: Are you out of your mind? How did this happen? I raised you, not a pack of Bible-thumping trailer trash. I raised you to think for yourself.
Astrid: No you didn't. You raised me to think like you. White Oleander
 


It was in the search for answers
that led me down that holiest of paths
to a new breed of demons with angelic faces  
toting love behind a mantra of hate

They say loneliness kills and leads us astray
into strange and dangerous places
and I believe it  

It was in the emptiness of my soul  
that I sought out any kind of holy binding
that would make my life make sense  
and instead I found an abyss of contradictions  
that rendered me a danger to myself when
the darkness wrapped itself around my heart  
and tore me from myself, into a deeper pit  
of loneliness than Ive ever known

God, forgive me
because I do not believe in your heaven
when Ive tasted hell my whole life  
and neither my prayers nor secret confessions
have led me to the peace your mindless followers
promised me in their bright-eyed euphoria

In the tissue-thin pages, I never found the answers  
my lonely soul sought, screaming out for a sense
of belonging somewhere, anywhere that I might fit
and be loved unconditionally without fear  
and judgment and unimaginable guilt

Singing empty praises among the congregation
I learnt that there is nothing wrong with being a Christian
if you pick and mix the holy verses to suit your prejudices  
never questioning the blindness of a faith that totes love  
behind a mantra of hate

Indie Adams 2012
Indie
Written by Indie (Miss Indie)
Published | Edited 28th Jul 2012
All writing remains the property of the author. Don't use it for any purpose without their permission.
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