how   to    lose   your    love

            
   
so we decided to meet    
   
lufthansa flight    
eighteen hour midair    
chaos    
   
loss of sleep    
and goods    
   
onset of impatience    
and self doubt    
   
greyhound station    
seven hours of    
silence    
more doubt    
fatigue    
jet lag    
   
half away across    
the world    
   
torrential rain    
of the west    
hotdog    
grilled chicken    
   
indian delivery guy    
exchange of    
smiles and    
hand shakes    
   
latest copy    
of debonair    
sneaked in    
quietly    
   
free of cost    
   
more of

waiting rain impatience    
   
finally i get thru    
hear your voice    
   
not what i would    
expect if someone    
had traveled    
from a 14 hour    
time difference    
   
buddha is right    
must not expect    
   
i get told there    
has been a storm and it will    
be there for some time    
   
the line gets disconnected    
   
i call some people and    
check the news    
   
no storms in your area    
   
your facebook is not    
accessible and there    
is dead line every    
time i call your    
landline    
   
$80 a night motel    
hbo bath pool bar    
   
three bottles of    
jack daniels    
   
seven hours of    
getting up from caked vomit    
pouring booze over knuckles    
screaming tearing up    
   
and i had given someone    
a dressing down for    
calling me a crazy fucker    
   
damn right    
   
the manager sends across    
an $300 escort    
a dresden doll    
   
she asks me if i    
have rubber    
lube funny things
   
her name is lenna    
she is  a year younger    
than me  
   
shaved    
facial fine  
but no hard stuff    
   
i pull her down    
she chokes me in    
between silicone plates    
   
i go at it for a while    
her rhythmic gasps    
bore me to death    
   
she claws my ass    
i give it hard    
she shudders    
yelps  
   
home run    
   
go at it for some more    
and some more    
   
she shudders again    
aah aah ohh oooh    
jesusfuck whatnot    
   
kisses me    
full of love    
a different kind    
than whats got me    
here    
     
and some more    
claws some more    
bites her lips    
fingers herself    
   
disgusting    
   
finally get down    
   
she gets to work in no time    
starts to make sounds    
all kinds    
   
i get close  
   
finally i feel it    
   
the tears burst out of me    
   
moments later watch lena    
leave with my wallet    
that has the only photograph    
of her inside    
   
goodbye lena    
goodbye stranger    
goodbye love    
   
hours dont wait up    
they keep going    
   
finally i get up       
a swig of jack daniels    
   
hello debonair      
damn beauty    
   
sigh