"happy accident "

           
           
           
    rock, paper, scissors.... dice rolls.... mirrored conversations in the fun house.... dream sequences of sorts- every emotion- absorbed-sticky the flesh suit in swamp soup; till the inevitable vomit....            
           
    walking a once upon a time scorched earth-town of horrors- now "modern time" illusionary amusement parks- with cotton candy- and hypnosis of varied kinds....            
           
   fantasizing about the deepest "trip" of one's life- whilst- dire need to psych out one's mind from this- so unreal before one's eyes- because a drink won't simply do.... swallowed- inside- the beast's belly- yet to have been shat out....            
           
  all the parachutes("easy ways out") seemed to have been sold out or kept away.... the "creator" seems to look down and in on the amusement- from outside of its globe within the cosmos.... i yell to the skies- only to hear "distant echoes"- meant to be nothing more....            
           
  chants and rituals.... sights that can't be unseen.... songs being song of all kinds.... promises of infinite green grass and blues skies.... the hypnosis continues....  a drink won't suffice....            
           
   shall i have my feelings sucked dry til completely desensitized.... should I jump or be consumed by that burning fire....the simulation continues.... experiencing "other lives" that aren't "mine".... as if it's some sort of reincarnation of some kind- though with a "from the outside looking in" awareness of some kind....            
           
   is this "torment" or "paradise"....it all feels like sensational bullshit.... a compilation of beautiful and ugly simulations-both seperate and combined....from snuggled up somewhere cozy and nice-  to falling from stories high.... feelings of everything and nothing at the same time....            
           
has to be a crime- to exist .... to exist like this.... and left with the life long question.... what was the point to all of it?  
 
 
  "happy accident"....