Out of shape hurdle

Now me!
It's simply easy for me to compliment another.
Another doing well makes me happy.

Gone are the days where I felt intense envy,seeing that another was doing better than me.

It's called maturity.

It's called diving introspectively.
Questioning myself about why I felt such envy.
The truth is,I was experiencing dissatisfaction in my own life.
Yearning for success,affection,connection, attention from the one who had got what I wanted.
Also,my self esteem was an all time low.
Solo,solo. I wanted to run,so low.

Growing up in a environment,where I was routinely mind-fucked.
'I love you.' Was a forbidden word.
So praising me-yeah right, they hated me piously. God got more attention than me!

I think my self-image was dependent on things outside of me.
I felt deficient,a forever hunger to fill that deficiency.

Cut a long story short.
I'm glad I got over that envious,out of shape hurdle. Cos it's good to see someone doing well.
And every now and again,when that envy starts poking at me.
I don't give it a chance to grow and grow.

Hey! Im only human.










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