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You infect my head, the process of my thoughts  
Iím overwhelmed with longing and the passion of loathing †  
† †
I hate you! I want you! †  
† †
And Iím dying here now your gaze has withered and turned †  
to shinier girls that wonít fuck with your head † †
all too happy to get down on their knees to please you † †
and I know how you like it, eyes alight when they gag †  
as you loom over them, filling them with your violence †  
† †
Fill me with your violence, please! †
Donít make me beg!
† †
Iíve become a voyeur, a stalker in dark and hidden places † †
searching for you, a fly on the wall to your conquests † †
remembering the time when I was one of them † †
when I believed you loved me, with your hands around my neck †  
teeth marking my lips as your own in blood and fiery passion †  
† †
Where the fuck are you? †
Now that youíve gone
† †
And I need, I needÖ I donít know what I fucking need Ö †  
but Iím sure you have it, and I stumble, fumble at the button on my jeans †  
exalting myself behind closed doors †  
as I imagine itís your fingers slick with my desire † †
pleasing me like no one else can, in that special way you do †  
† †
Eyes closed, I can still taste your breath of whiskey, cigarettes and me † †
and Iím dying here, bleeding memories and desire onto the floor † †
your name sitting razor-sharp on the edge of my tongue †  
that I refuse to scream as I fall to my knees in ecstasy and anguish † †
overcome with the realisationÖ † †
† †
That I fucking hate you! †  
† †
© Indie Adams 2012
Written by Indie (Miss Indie)
Published | Edited 16th Oct 2012
All writing remains the property of the author. Don't use it for any purpose without their permission.
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