Emptiness

i used to thrive on a full schedule
as if to say “see how busy i am, see how important “
i believed that filling up my life meant
nothing unexpected, nothing bad, could intrude
when indeed it could and did

after several traumatic experiences
i realized a full schedule meant
i was spread too thin
i was mediocre at a bunch of things
not excellent at any

i discovered that a full schedule meant
i wasn’t making fresh discoveries,
wasn’t available for surprises or revelations
with a full schedule i missed opportunities
because i had to say “no my schedule is full”

by having a full schedule , there was no room
no room for unexpected opportunities
no room for new relationships
no room for adventure
no room for growth

now that there is room in my schedule
my mind has opened to what is most valuable
now that there is room in my schedule
life is richer and more complex

emptiness abounds
emptiness enriches
emptiness promotes life

© 2024 Raibeart Bruis