deepundergroundpoetry.com
Shaken Balance
SHAKEN BALANCE
Suddenly My Path Got Jumbled
My Certain Plan Suddenly Was Unclear
Instinct , Find Strength Internal, Instead , I Just Found Fear
Charting a Courageous Course
a Jumbled Plan That Quickly Crumbled
Deep Sadness Lives Here , Now I Just Pray ,This Deep Sadness Disappears
This Jumbled Path Defines a New
Never , Starkly Alone, I Face This Bridge I’m Forced to Cross
I Take no Solace Knowing Billions
Have and Will Be Familiar with This Loss
See, My Mom is Gone
I Was Not Prepared
I Never Imagined the Sharpness of This Grief.
Denial, Anger, Bargain,
Depressed
Imprisoned in the Maze of Disbelief
Raised on Her Wisdom, I Must Trust Her Love. I Must Trust These Tears Will Turn to Smiles,
and That My Memories Turn to Blessings, After a Little While
Her Strength is in Me, Her Mighty Spirit My Inheritance
Her Guidance Leads My Jumbled Journey
My Acceptance Her Deliverance
Bobby O
◦
Suddenly My Path Got Jumbled
My Certain Plan Suddenly Was Unclear
Instinct , Find Strength Internal, Instead , I Just Found Fear
Charting a Courageous Course
a Jumbled Plan That Quickly Crumbled
Deep Sadness Lives Here , Now I Just Pray ,This Deep Sadness Disappears
This Jumbled Path Defines a New
Never , Starkly Alone, I Face This Bridge I’m Forced to Cross
I Take no Solace Knowing Billions
Have and Will Be Familiar with This Loss
See, My Mom is Gone
I Was Not Prepared
I Never Imagined the Sharpness of This Grief.
Denial, Anger, Bargain,
Depressed
Imprisoned in the Maze of Disbelief
Raised on Her Wisdom, I Must Trust Her Love. I Must Trust These Tears Will Turn to Smiles,
and That My Memories Turn to Blessings, After a Little While
Her Strength is in Me, Her Mighty Spirit My Inheritance
Her Guidance Leads My Jumbled Journey
My Acceptance Her Deliverance
Bobby O
◦
Published 2nd Dec 2023
Author's Note
I still pick up the phone to dial her and then catch myself v
All writing remains the property of the author. Don't use it for any purpose without their permission.
likes 4
reading list entries 0
comments 10
reads 167
Commenting Preference:
The author encourages honest critique.
2nd Dec 2023 10:35pm
I'm ever so sorry for your loss. I'm caring for my mom who's dying from dementia slowly.
Your words spoke to the grief in me.
I like when people show vulnerability. It's to be admired.
Your words spoke to the grief in me.
I like when people show vulnerability. It's to be admired.
2nd Dec 2023 10:53pm
2nd Dec 2023 11:32pm
Thank you, that made my night.
Was a hard day.
I hope you have a peaceful night. 🌙
Was a hard day.
I hope you have a peaceful night. 🌙
4th Dec 2023 1:45pm
It's cleverly written. The odd punctuation makes the reader stumble as, of course, someone suffering a loss would do.
The punctuation is aided by the equally odd placement of the rhymes giving the impression of incoherence. A stuttering incoherence.
But it is the capitalisation of most of the words with the odd placement of a few lower case letters which clinches the overall effect of confusion.
Oddly enough, when my mother died, I couldn't understand why the whole world didn't know about it. I wanted to shake all the blank faces I passed or who passed me and shout " Surely you know ?"
Such was the shock, such was the shock.
The punctuation is aided by the equally odd placement of the rhymes giving the impression of incoherence. A stuttering incoherence.
But it is the capitalisation of most of the words with the odd placement of a few lower case letters which clinches the overall effect of confusion.
Oddly enough, when my mother died, I couldn't understand why the whole world didn't know about it. I wanted to shake all the blank faces I passed or who passed me and shout " Surely you know ?"
Such was the shock, such was the shock.
5th Dec 2023 2:22am
Your intuition proves do exact I smiled. I messed with cadence and punctuation to offer the odd angles of vision a tactile escape. Thank you for your thoughts and insight
5th Dec 2023 6:47am
I like how my hand starts to shake when I been writing too long 🤌🤦 love your words 👊😎
5th Dec 2023 6:54am
5th Dec 2023 6:52am
hello it hurts when you lose a loved one expertly written it speaks to me where I'm at I have a loved one who is fading... it's rough ❤️
5th Dec 2023 9:17am
Thank you. It’s a strange feeling knowing that it’s what most all experience it and yet it’s so personal we may still feel all alone.
16th Dec 2023 11:01am
