shape shamers

 
close your eyes...if it offends...
...if you don't wish to see...
...turn a blind eye...the way you do injustice
...it isn't really there...just pretend
live in denial if you must
but stop belittling what doesn't affect you
hating for its own sake
nobody's saying ya gotta date 'em
look to your personal environ

I'm here to tell you...
...it's real
they will troll you
feed foul names & images into your mind
make you feel less than...
...or too much...
{as if we already didn't...}
...it's relentless

completely ignoring their compassion...
...or maybe they no longer have any...
neglected it too long in favor of bashing
maybe it makes them feel more in control
who knows...

I spent years in my early youth
thin with no shape...no substance
starving myself...yet wishing I had more
...more hips...more boobs...
...less bottom
...and still I was made to believe
...I wasn't enough
...ruthlessly mocked

so I built myself armor made of curves
hoping to block out their cruel words
then they came at me with disgust
saying I'm lazy & don't make any effort
"you could be beautiful if you just tried"
yet I was still me...inside...
wearing a different shape...different size

I'd seen it happen to friends
...from the other end...
...more lush in their frame
and I remembered...
wishing I could be more like them...
offering to trade some of my voluptuous ass...
...for some of their ample bosom
yet there I was...suddenly fuller in figure
...still not accepted

I eventually learned it didn't matter what I did
the shape shamers didn't care
they went for the throat for other reasons
...though I never understood them
I had to tune them out...
...focus on my own health
fuck 'em...let them sort themselves out

call it what you will
curvy, thicc, fat or phat...
{I prefer luscious myself...}
...thin, skinny, slender or lank...
think before you speak...
assess your true reasoning
does your opinion even matter...
does the existence...
...the decisions...
...the reality of someone else...
...have anything at all to do with you
or will your cruelty only add fuel to the fire of their pain
ask yourself what you truly gain
stop trolling & crawl back under your bridge
...we're all just trying to LIVE