burn the notebook

sometimes i resent how the math adds up and how i failed
how it all makes sense, and how i hate how it is what it is
i've done enough reminiscing to see every detail
hammered each nail myself, no room for forgiveness
this time

i hate how you're getting exactly what you need, both ways
i'd say i tried, but i still see the look on your face when i walked away

for fuck sake
i still write about you
is that punishment enough?!
is that not enough?!

what is left to be said? nothing from you; echoes in dreams
you're happy there, in my mind, but you can never trust a shadow
your smile always told me something is never as it seems
but you're not here, so i must believe it all still lives deep below
this time

i gave my life time and time again, but there's always one last lie to get through
can't say i wouldn't be there, but you can't trust what you can bleed through

for fuck sake
i still dream about you
isn't that punishment enough?!
isn't that enough...

is that not enough to say

i'm sorry