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Revisiting

The aged surround
Mourning the reminder
Sinking lower
Feeling her presence
The love
That linked us together
Yet the hungry earth
Dissolves the resolve
In all of us

Nine was young for this
And here I sit
With the same pit
Now silent
Empty
As before

There is no presence here
Just memory
Who were they kidding

Her grave now weathered
Uncle leaning upon the same tree
Watching
Intently
As he did long ago

'You look as lost as you did
When you were a kid'

I ponder this

To find myself lost
When I am old and grey
If I am to see the day
I shall consider myself lucky

Cursed is the one
Who knows all.  
Written by jenny_is_hungry
Published
Author's Note
Revisiting who I was and how my child self was so much wiser and also foolish in thinking one could ever get bored in this life. It was a great fear of mine and still is, in an irrational sense, as if I'll be cursed with immortality and indestructibility. Eternity is hell no matter how you write it. This death made me face a lot of these things, but my earliest memories contain the heavy fear of heaven the minute the concept was preached to me. All these earthly rules, I was never going to make it, and eternity? Holy C. No. Eventually, we'd all become gods upon ourselves and only creations would harbor our time. Ugh. I could make a hundred poems about forever and boredom.
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