deepundergroundpoetry.com
Internals Seperate
So that's just it huh?
This is my purpose afterall
My destiny
As some may say
To see my body
Only as an extension of my spirit
Separate
A part of the external world
Just as I used to see as a child
So to speak
Looking down at my hands
My arms
My mind could not comprehend
What it was looking at
Yes these are my hands
Yes these are my arms
But
These have no meaning
To the type of mind I have
How to work these things
We call hands and feet
Legs and arms
My brain just cannot simply
Understand
I battle every goddamn day
This external body of mine
Told how to move it
Skin suffering
Irritated and confused
Never fully grasping the idea
This is my own personal hell
Needing to learn
That it's ok
To see myself as separate
From my body
External
Something to go back
Back to the earth
Everyone
Seems to "know" what they believe
And believe what they know
I've always just been screaming deeply
Waiting for someone to come
Come save me
Guide me
Guide me in the right direction
So that I too
May better understand myself
My external body
How to move it more fluently
Work my mind more strongly
And heal the internal spirit within
This is my purpose afterall
My destiny
As some may say
To see my body
Only as an extension of my spirit
Separate
A part of the external world
Just as I used to see as a child
So to speak
Looking down at my hands
My arms
My mind could not comprehend
What it was looking at
Yes these are my hands
Yes these are my arms
But
These have no meaning
To the type of mind I have
How to work these things
We call hands and feet
Legs and arms
My brain just cannot simply
Understand
I battle every goddamn day
This external body of mine
Told how to move it
Skin suffering
Irritated and confused
Never fully grasping the idea
This is my own personal hell
Needing to learn
That it's ok
To see myself as separate
From my body
External
Something to go back
Back to the earth
Everyone
Seems to "know" what they believe
And believe what they know
I've always just been screaming deeply
Waiting for someone to come
Come save me
Guide me
Guide me in the right direction
So that I too
May better understand myself
My external body
How to move it more fluently
Work my mind more strongly
And heal the internal spirit within
Published 22nd Mar 2023
Author's Note
I've always seen my body as something separate from myself. Growing up I tried to suppress this view only for it to come and hit me 2 times harder. Growing up with some mobility issues and being born with some mental as well as skin issues, my mother was always hard on me. However her teachings couldn't get through to me and neither of us could understand why. As I got older, I started to look closer and realized how I feel like something separate from my external body. I thought "what if this is all just a video game and we're all being controlled by the players" lol. Little did I realize, later on down the line that, that shit actually makes since to certain communities of people! Just described in different words. Our "players" being our actual inner beings....hope you enjoy the read!
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Anonymous
22nd Mar 2023 6:43pm
<< post removed >>
22nd Mar 2023 11:54pm
