deepundergroundpoetry.com
Cards
Wanting to reshuffle the deck
too many to be discarded
places I wish I’d never been
heinous secrets I keep guarded
Longing for a different past
inclination to numb, to forget
yet memories continue to haunt
mislead actions I now regret
Naivety left me vulnerable
many took unjust advantage
leaving me in ruins of my youth
ponderous burdens I could not manage
In reflection, admitting my shame
capable, willing now that I’m grown
accepting my life’s actual trauma
self-aware, I have nothing to atone
too many to be discarded
places I wish I’d never been
heinous secrets I keep guarded
Longing for a different past
inclination to numb, to forget
yet memories continue to haunt
mislead actions I now regret
Naivety left me vulnerable
many took unjust advantage
leaving me in ruins of my youth
ponderous burdens I could not manage
In reflection, admitting my shame
capable, willing now that I’m grown
accepting my life’s actual trauma
self-aware, I have nothing to atone
Published 7th Mar 2023
| Edited 31st Aug 2023
All writing remains the property of the author. Don't use it for any purpose without their permission.
likes 6
reading list entries 1
comments 15
reads 182
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The author encourages honest critique.
7th Mar 2023 1:19pm
7th Mar 2023 1:41pm
7th Mar 2023 4:29pm
Dear M,
“heinous secrets I keep guarded” know this all too well. Closing stanza is an amazing self awareness of acceptance and moving onward. Exceedingly difficult to attain and a lifetime of constant work to keep up at times. This poem is wonderfully laid out in a mini time line of growth. Very relatable and quite hopeful in its own right. H🌷
“heinous secrets I keep guarded” know this all too well. Closing stanza is an amazing self awareness of acceptance and moving onward. Exceedingly difficult to attain and a lifetime of constant work to keep up at times. This poem is wonderfully laid out in a mini time line of growth. Very relatable and quite hopeful in its own right. H🌷
7th Mar 2023 4:53pm
Dear H,
We tend to keep those secrets close to the chest. For me, I do so out of shame and not wanting them to be seen and therefore judged. But I have learned overtime to allow for trust with a very selective few. Yes, it takes a long time and work on a daily basis to heal. Thank you for your lovely comments. Wishing you well. Bless.
Mel
We tend to keep those secrets close to the chest. For me, I do so out of shame and not wanting them to be seen and therefore judged. But I have learned overtime to allow for trust with a very selective few. Yes, it takes a long time and work on a daily basis to heal. Thank you for your lovely comments. Wishing you well. Bless.
Mel
7th Mar 2023 6:26pm
The process of balanced healing and creation seems to unravel and reveal itself too slow for our own liking, but since every part of us needs to drop into a new alignment and re-integrate with each little step we take, then maybe that accounts for our experience of 'slowness'. Regarding our pasts, I think we humans are the hardest critics, and yet at the same time it shows we have moved on and are looking at past events through more mature eyes.
9th Mar 2023 12:34pm
Dear Josh,
I am definitely my own worse critic and agreed I do see things more accurately now that I am older. Thanks for the read and taking the time to comment. Bless
Mel
I am definitely my own worse critic and agreed I do see things more accurately now that I am older. Thanks for the read and taking the time to comment. Bless
Mel
8th Mar 2023 00:15am
9th Mar 2023 12:35pm
8th Mar 2023 8:13pm
Beautifully expressed and written. The courage to change the outcomes of the cards without reshuffling.
9th Mar 2023 12:38pm
Dear Skelly,
It does take work. Thanks for the compliment and for stopping by and commenting. Bless.
Mel
It does take work. Thanks for the compliment and for stopping by and commenting. Bless.
Mel
10th Mar 2023 11:31am
People often take advantage of an innocent person, and that innocent person breaks down when people played with his/her feelings. Well deeply penned!
10th Mar 2023 11:56am
Dear Dimpy,
Thank you for stopping by and taking the time to comment. You are right. Kindness is often perceived as a weakness and as such people try to take advantage. I am older and wiser now but will always practice kindness and compassion. Bless
Mel
Thank you for stopping by and taking the time to comment. You are right. Kindness is often perceived as a weakness and as such people try to take advantage. I am older and wiser now but will always practice kindness and compassion. Bless
Mel
10th Mar 2023 12:01pm
1st Sep 2023 10:37am
1st Sep 2023 1:59pm
I am sorry and that is empathy not pity. I have found some lessons in life taught me to be able to see toxicity as well as genuine authenticity. Not always easy but worth the price. Bless🙏 Thank you so much for reading!
