deepundergroundpoetry.com
Almighty Rain
Once upon a clock face
not yet invented
when the Devil wore diapers
and Hell was a wrinkle
in his black leather eye
(but nonetheless
heating up quite nicely
thank you)
all of a sudden
it began to rain
Another equally difficult child
perched on a heavenly cloud
spotted smoke
and bellowed down from on high:
'You'll be sorry
you'll get burned
if you play with fire--
best not mess around'
to which the Devil replied:
'I was here before you
find some place else to pee'
and that is why
contrary to outrageously wild
and fanciful mythical beliefs
over seventy per cent
of the Earth is water
today
Published 25th Jan 2023
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25th Jan 2023 9:51pm
Anonymous
- Edited 25th Jan 2023 10:16pm
25th Jan 2023 10:09pm
I do have questions though.
Why would a devil make the Earth mostly liquid that would quash his own being, made of the fire.
Or is that because he couldn’t pee himself because of the diapers. Or he did pee himself and it leaked which is a terrible advert for the diapers. Or the diapers filled and floated to the surface and became his own raft. And that’s how life boats were invented.
And this is mostly why I can’t sleep at night.
Why would a devil make the Earth mostly liquid that would quash his own being, made of the fire.
Or is that because he couldn’t pee himself because of the diapers. Or he did pee himself and it leaked which is a terrible advert for the diapers. Or the diapers filled and floated to the surface and became his own raft. And that’s how life boats were invented.
And this is mostly why I can’t sleep at night.
Under normal circumstances, M, I would ordinarily refer you to the relevant chapters of Genesis but owing to an overnight epiphany which included a vision in glorious wreckmecolor on the bedroom ceiling plus a mysterious and compelling impromptu voice message from my Google Home, I have been tasked with rewriting various sections of the good book which is henceforth to be known as the Wible.
Not wishing to fall behind the times Ggod has decided to offer Apple and Microsoft style updates to enhance and improve user experience.
A decision will follow shortly on whether these revisions are to incorporate the fabled and risque lost book of Eunuch.
With regard to your own dedicated fascination for diapers I thought you'd like to know that those previously referenced as worn by the Devil were in fact a special order designed to accommodate his rather large tail. Owing to limited demand I understand they are no longer available but I will attempt to source some for you if required.
Best ~Abra
Not wishing to fall behind the times Ggod has decided to offer Apple and Microsoft style updates to enhance and improve user experience.
A decision will follow shortly on whether these revisions are to incorporate the fabled and risque lost book of Eunuch.
With regard to your own dedicated fascination for diapers I thought you'd like to know that those previously referenced as worn by the Devil were in fact a special order designed to accommodate his rather large tail. Owing to limited demand I understand they are no longer available but I will attempt to source some for you if required.
Best ~Abra
Anonymous
26th Jan 2023 2:51pm
I think I found the prophet who wrote the wible. Praise be to Ggod!
https://youtube.com/watch?v=G2DCExerOsA&si=EnSIkaIECMiOmarE
For context, apparently he wears diapers on his head. So maybe that’s the way forward.
https://youtube.com/watch?v=G2DCExerOsA&si=EnSIkaIECMiOmarE
For context, apparently he wears diapers on his head. So maybe that’s the way forward.
