grouchy

 
silently I squirm inside my skin
you touch the aether and I burn with understanding
stoically keeping things to myself
with great trepidation I walk

troubling not the dark spirits I toil on
learning what it is I am to learn from adversity
affliction brought into my life, I yearn
I want to be carefree and happy
it isn't to be today
because chaos rules the world

when things are going smoothly I am reminded
to be grateful for the moments in between the torture

in these moments of clarity and pain
I call to my God but he is the source of of the discontent
he plots with great pleasure to thwart my attempts
I get angry, he is amused
I don't know if I understand him at all

I get so weary of people telling me he is nothing but light
bullshit, I know the man

so today, with great rancor I begin the day
we are at odds and I am grouchy

let the fun begin