Revelry

Dialing in a remedy
Attracted to ill pleasantries
My destiny is engraved on the moon

Was counting stars at seventeen
Obsessed, numb, heart zero degrees
Thawing out within space painted maroon

Thoughts escaping me to love me
Were feeding me right back to me
And shadows crave those who are broken down

Then twenty-four I burned it all
I opened up, obeyed the crawl
One thousand curses free flying around

Lament hatchets buried in skulls
Dehumanized, caged in a lull
Labeling forgiveness a luxury

Not anyone or anything,
My nihilistic revelry:
Holding on to letting go at thirty.