Can't Forget How I Got the Scar on My Forehead

Dear PS,

I really appreciated the message in this poem. For me, it may have taken a while to cross that mountain but getting over it and realizing self worth was a huge win. Your closing stanza is fabulous- love the mention of ruining the manicure. You’ve so many heartfelt scenes: from friends who’ve drifted on and someone special to help sort out or spotlight your own needs and gifts, it reads a lot like my own story. Terrific write. H🌷

Thank you! Such a lovely comment, and very much appreciated. Being able to grasp and hold on to some self worth, even if it only seems enough sometimes to keep you pushing forward, is a big freaking deal. :-)  

I've been very lucky that I've found the people in my life that I have, including the ones who've drifted away.

Thanks again for the comment, it's nice to know someone relates to this. :-)

It's always a risk that the sincerely introverted will become "dangerously good at being alone".

The older I get, the more "me" time I want, although mostly for reading and writing purposes. However, I would be a dolt if I did not notice the intrinsic advantages that isolation provides for the avoidance of awkward social interactions.

I'm an introvert in the sense that I need some alone time to recover from most social interactions, but I do want the social interactions. I love the people in my life, and I want to spend time with them. I get great joy and peace from being in a live music audience.

I missed out on a lot of life for a lot of years being dangerously good at being alone. It was not a place of contentment like most of my alone time is now.

That makes sense. It's up to us as individuals to determine if our intentional isolation is heatlhy or not.

Or if our isolation is intentional at all :-)

I've enjoyed our little conversations, by the way.

Conversation is a dying art, and perhaps it is attributable to less constructive social interaction overall, leaving folks with no opportunity to practice. But conversely, I find myself more capable of being graciously thought provoking with a keyboard than with real time discussion, due to more time to select a more appropriate verbiage in between the exchange of remarks.    
    
As the by-product of a big family and having spent years working with the spoiled rotten and violently impatient American Boomer public, I feel as though I have a valid excuse to socially isolate, or at least screen out as many of the hostiles in advance as I can.    
  
But how did you get so cool? Never mind. That's what the poem addresses. See how bad of a listener I am?

Am I cool? I mean, it's cool (sorry) if I am. :-)

I do tend to be a bit better at conversation by keyboard than in person, because of the ability to see what I'm saying before I send it, whereas my mouth does tend to get a bit ahead of me at times.

Depends on the conversation though, and how familiar I am with who I'm talking to, because my fingers can get a little bit ahead of me at times, too.

One of the ways that I came out of my shell way back when was via online conversation, in the early days of the internet... the dark dial-up days. Conversations with strangers, some of whom became friends (a few still are, decades later) taught me things about myself and about other people.

You are wise to question the customarily sanctioned characteristic of coolness, if only to tease out whether the person you are dealing with is the sort who thinks it's "cool" to do horrible things. Were such the case, coolness then becomes an enabling lingo that you did not really intend.  

Now that we've established that, I would gladly wager that you would be extra
cool with the addition of a raspberry beret to your wardrobe.

Unless you already have one, then that would merely be an unnecessary redundancy.

I do not yet have a raspberry beret, though I've considered it. I've not tried any color of beret yet, to be honest, though I've recently decided I should be the wearer of hats. I'm not sure why I haven't taken up hats before. Because it's summer, I've mostly gone for hats with brims, but when I need to worry a bit less about hiding from the sun, that beret option may come into play. And I think I look good in raspberries. :-)

I don't care for raspberries right off the vine (I'm really more of a blackberry chap), but the color is attractive. I recommend the beret for evening wear, of course, and recently acquired one for the purposes of solidarity among nocturnally oriented sonneteers. Hasn't been cold enough to wear it yet, so I'm very much looking forward to autumn temperatures.

Generally, I agree with your ranking of raspberries and blackberries. The exception being that when I was in Norway, because they were a revelation right off the vine there. Also, best strawberries I've ever eaten.

You need to find a new profile pic of a beret-wearing of a nighttime sonneteer, methinks.

I'll be curious to see if a beret suits me or not, there are aesthetic factors to consider, but I will find out. :-)

To be sure, I am not confident enough in my masculinity (anymore) to try wearing a raspberry hue in any of my ensembles, which is why I opted for navy blue on my particular beret. It will just have to do.

New profile pic? Great. Now I have to spend the rest of the summer in the gym and get a facelift...lol!

Aesthetic consideration is so all consuming, eh?

I kid, I kid...but seriously, you will never see me in overalls.  

I realize that mentioning overalls is a bit non sequitur but a man must retain some sartorial pride after all. :-)

I once knew a man who believed men should never wear shorts or any form of sandal. He was quite adamant about it. We all have our things.

It's a shame about the cultural view of some colors. Pink was considered masculine once.

I can't imagine you'd need a facelift with those chiseled features. They seem pretty set in... bronze perhaps? Hehe

I was thinking perhaps something along the lines of Ettore Ximenes' Boy with e Beret. Though a more extensive google might include come up with a shinier option :-)

He must must have had knees as white as Elon Musk.

As for those chiseled features, I got those in a thrift shop for a mere twelve bucks. It does say MADE IN GREECE on the back side. Couldn't believe my luck!

I will be certain to search engine the holy living shit out of your e Beret reference at work tonight. Not too sure about the shiny option though. There are already so many who are convinced that I have a tinfoil hat.

Probably ought to keep some opinions to myself. Cheers!

The honesty and clarity in this poem are refreshing and pleasant. I could certainly relate to much of what you've gone through; sadly, though, I haven't been able to find any worth in myself or in life in general so far. Still, this poem makes me see that another kind of existence is possible. Thank you for this great piece.

Mundus