deepundergroundpoetry.com

Sodden shoes: I = I

The sky opened  
and turned me  
to a fae creature,  
thirsting for  
new realms.  
 
And it opened.  
All at once.  
Thick bulbs of  
water,  
and  
tiny chinks of  
hail thwacking
against my body;  
blinding me  
with the
run of salt  
from my skin  
in my eyes.  
 
And it opened  
all at once  
on me  
alone in this  
primordial dimension,  
 
I couldn’t see  
the trail,  
the tree line.  
the lake,  
or the canals,  
except in the  
flash-snap-cracks  
of the lightning.  
And the harder  
it crashed down on me
the more the worm  
of trepidation  
fell away  
and a crazed triumph  
sucked in the  
rot in my gut,  
 
As if this were my song.
As if this were my time.  
 
As if this were the  
way immortality felt,  
all cold drops on  
hot skin,  
the elements  
screaming  
their rage
against me.
 
And I screamed back  
 
something primal and  
rugged.  
 
Then I ran.
 
Laughing,  
and  
hollering  
at an  
unforgiven  
landscape.  
 
I ran like it was the  
last time I’d ever  
step on the earth.  
 
I ran like a  
feral creature  
grabbing chaos  
from  
the ether  
and wearing it as  
new skin.  
 
I ran shrieking  
into the lunacy of  
the darkness,  
unrepentant,  
unafraid,  
 
alive.  
 
And it opened  
all at once  
that  
I am.  
 
It opened all at once.  
That.  
I.  
am.
 
 
 
  
Written by Betty
Published | Edited 14th Jul 2022
Author's Note
I run ultramarathons. It’s as fucked as it sounds – anything more than a marathon, 26.2 miles. My preference is the 50K, or 32-ish miles. I prefer trails, which are harder terrain. This was a seven mile trail, easy terrain. Easy run. Familiar enough I didn't need a buddy.

I was halfway in when it fucking let LOOSE. There are no trees or places to hide in a marsh.
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