Raphium Series~God

 
I hear him and he is always with me
even when I don't hear him I know he's there
silently observing my choices
watching me interact with humanity
he says he likes smoking in my house or my body
he likes getting high with me

he isn't as expected
I'm grateful he isn't
I don't know who I was interacting with at some point in my life
it wasn't him
not the one I knew as a child
and if it was him he was telling me grown up things

he desired me
I couldn't reconcile that in my mind
it was against what the humans said of God
he likes to have a good time
and yes he likes to fuck
pretty woman and men challenging behind the eyes

he has his congregation, his sheep
they are for praise
they are innocent in that they don't know anything
but what they are taught
they are simple creatures beautiful still

I counted myself as one
he's told me I'm all together different
he wanted one like me
set aside for his purposes
flavored with joy and pain

I know codes to the universes
deeply encrypted in music for one are these codes
all energies sing
he is no different

I once swam in space

searching
searching
searching

he brought me home to him
my quest not over
just beginning again