deepundergroundpoetry.com

Tears On A Table

She's a timid little one, she's never met anyone quite like me
There is a gravity between us, but there are issues with security
She's really been through the ringer, things that haven't been worked out
Situations rushed into without the concept of possible doubt

She was a sweetie so quick to give her all
But eventually there comes a time that you're afraid of the next fall
She decided that love was suspect, maybe even not hers to be had
Although she played the role of joy, her heart and mind were sad

Though few in partners it seemed the outcome was always the same
There was only one constant variable and so she accepted the blame
"I can't do this anymore," will ring forever in her ears
Love forever being chased as she softly asked it to come here

Attention was freely given but wasn't ask that it be returned
She learned to carry matches in her heart prepared to watch bridges burn
Yes again the numbers were few, but they seemed to be awaiting their turn
The sex was without restrictions, the cream was as if it had been churned

She felt ill within, thoughts of herself as the sickness to this world
There was a connection between these problems and her pains as a girl
The pains of the nights when doors were opened, securities were breached
The pains of a trusted invader that had decided to turn sneak

Promises made in their silent tone as they did what they did
The false love and protection was begged to be hid
She was mentally and physically crushed and willing to accept
Her abusers of both sexes redesigned her psyche while building their abusive rep

Her mind then was covered by so many deep and ugly scars
She couldn't remember when things ended, or the limits of conscience was to far
She deserted memories to the visual and buried everything else in there deep
While another abuser kept appearing, declaring that they were hers to keep

The illusions couldn't be seen through, her past intersected with her future
The faces changed, their age, their sexes, but not the abuses
How could so much weight be placed on her shoulders
Atlas was sentenced to the heavens and Sisyphus was sentenced to his boulder

Was she sentenced to an eternity of wallowing in her pain alone
With no one by her side declaring her heart their home
With a tear that dropped on the table she wrote the word, "pain"
Saying it, allowing it to roll off of her lips, whipped again and again
I_IS_ME
Written by I_IS_ME
Published
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