Crosstraining to prevent atrophy

 
I clicked out of the
atrophy article
simultaneously
amused and horrified
and pretty sure what
I just read was a hoax.

I did some research.
Read a few more things
and my amusement dried up
super fucking quick.

Holy motherfuck!
Not.
A.
Hoax.

As an athlete
I understand
how quickly muscles
can deteriorate
without training
and cross training.

I know, personally,
the best way to get
stronger is to work harder,

and harder,

until everything aches,
and moving is shaky,
hitchy;

To work
until it
hurts

every time.

And the way to
get weak

is to not do it.

Not train.
Not cross-train.
Not use
the muscle
at all.

And the article
I just read focused
on
clitoral atrophy

Clitoral atrophy.

CLITORAL FUCKIN’ ATROPHY.

The deterioration,
weakening,
and shrinking
(I cringed in
actual horror
over that)

of the girl dick.

As an athlete
I take my
body
very
seriously.

Very.

I have committed to
an intense
training program.

I’m going to
work my clit
until my fingers cramp,

until the muscle on
my forearm pops
like a bodybuilder’s

until I can do
full body
clitoral
push-ups.

I’m going to train
the way I always train

Until. It. Fucking.
Hurts.

But just to be sure I’m
doing enough…

I’m also
committing
to a little
cross-training.

Baby,

I’m going to need to
borrow
your
tongue.

Bring a pillow for your neck.
I want to be thorough.